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The Greatest Story Since Transformers

If Michael Bay deems it, then it must be true and/or explode: Megan reviews I Am Number Four by Pittacus Lore.

The Greatest Story Since Transformers

BOOK REPORT for I Am Number Four (Lorien Legacies Book 1) by Pittacus Lore

Cover Story: No Thanks
BFF Charm: Yep!
Swoonworthy Scale: 3
Talky Talk: Herp Derp
Bonus Factor: Animal Companion
Anti-Bonus Factor: Bad Sci-Fi
Relationship Status: Surprise Hook Up

Cover Story: No Thanks

Honestly, the original cover isn't that bad. It certainly gives off an alien vibe with its glowy crop circle thing. But that COLOR. It's practically screaming to be noticed and that will not do if you're not in the mood to defend your literary choices. Also, I had to include the recent movie tie-in reissue because hello weirdly bronze Alex Pettyfer and the best Michael Bay quote, ever.

The Deal:

Number Four comes from Lorien, an earth-like planet that was genocided out of existence by an evil race of aliens called Mogadorians. As a last ditch effort, Lorien was able to send nine of its children off planet on a spaceship sent to earth. Each child has a guardian who will help train their superpowers (called Legacies) when they come of age. All nine were assigned a number and due to a powerful Loric charm, cannot be killed out of order. When our story takes place, Number Four and his guardian Henri are on the run, having recently discovered that Number Three has been killed. They move to Ohio, trying to stay out of trouble until Number Four and the others can develop their Legacies and fight the evil Mogadorians before they do to earth what they did to Lorian.

BFF Charm: Yep!

I like Number Four! I was definitely worried he would have a severe case of woe-is-me-itis, which would have understandable considering the whole genocide/always on the run/never getting to live a normal life thing. But he doesn't! He is very understanding of his situation, the sacrifices he needs to make and just how important he and the other Lorien children are. He's a good friend and is brave without being reckless. Plus Michael Bay says Number Four is a Hero For This Generation. Right there! On the movie tie-in cover! And this man knows heroes! This is the man who turned Louis Stevens Shia LaBeouf into an action star. The man who gave introduced us to Megan Fox's eternally pouted lips. He is a man we can trust. My BFF charm may not have the unexplained magical properties of a Loric charm, but I still hope Number Four accepts it!

Swoonworthy Scale: 3

Number Four and his love interest Sarah are pretty bland. I mean, they're cute enough, and I appreciate the fact that they're uncomplicated. (I mean, besides the complication of lying about being an alien.) They are both attracted to each other right away, are unafraid to show it and don't bother playing games. But overall, it's a bit saccharine. A lot of make outs and cuddles and late night phone calls that has me asking where's my outercourse, guys?! There was actually a scene that went something like this:

I like you. I like you too. I miss you. But I'm right here, silly! But that's when I miss you the most. In that case, I miss you too.

I'm paraphrasing, but only barely. The worst part of that conversion is how real it felt.

Talky Talk: Herp Derp

Let's just say, this book wasn't given a multi-million dollar movie deal for its prose. Number Four is the first person narrator and most of the book is in simple, short sentences. Not terrible, but nothing terribly exciting either.

Bonus Factor: Animal Companion

I'll be honest, I'm a sucker for some animal companions. Bernie Kosar is Number Four's dog and any scene in the book is immediately enhanced when a cute dog is present. Plus, there might be MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE to Bernie Kosar.*

*Last Transformers joke, promise.

Anti-Bonus Factor: Bad Sci-Fi

This book is not science fiction. I know, but it has aliens! I'm channeling my inner Roman here, but that is not enough. The premise is interesting enough, but the world building really falls flat. I suppose we will learn more about Lorien in future sequels but I have so much more I'd like to know about. More about Loric society, how things were structured, whether there are multiple races, their religion, etc. The very few flashbacks set on Lorien were disappointing. They've mastered intergalactic travel, yet they still read newspapers? And wear glasses? Huh? Plus their Legacies are a bunch of hodge-podge Heroes-style powers and the Loriens odd mix of science and magic don't seem to follow any set of rules.

Casting Call:

Guys, did I tell you this is coming out as a movie?! I think I might have mentioned it, once or twice. And it's coming out February 18th! So, I'm not going to recast it because Alex Pettyfer is very, very pretty. So here, a trailer!

I will totally watch this movie for you all. And review it! No seriously, no need to thank me, I am always ready to take one for the team. Maybe I'm a hero of our generation too!

Relationship Status: Surprise Hook Up

I had a lot of reservations about this book. I mean, this book has quite the reputation and is definitely more commercial than the books I tend to date. But we were at the same place at the same time, maybe there was alcohol involved, and here I am! And I actually had a pretty fun time. No, I don't want this book to be my boyfriend but I had enough fun that I may even check out the sequel when it comes out. If you aren't looking for something too meaningful, this book is certainly available for a no-strings fling.

Megan Crane's photo About the Author: Megan is an unabashed fangirl who is often in a state of panic about her inability to watch, read and play all the things.