OH DANG YOU GUYS, Warner Bros released yet another trailer for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2! You know, because I hadn't already devoted about 95% of my brain space to thinking about the movie. FINE. TAKE THE LAST 5% WARNER BROTHERS. I will now need someone to spoon feed me. Thank god champ cans come with a straw.
Obviously, I had no choice but to put this movie through the scientific ringer, because it's probably THE LAST HARRY POTTER MOVIE TRAILER EVER MADE. I can't even process that information, which is why we'll need to analyze the shizz out of every single second in this trailer.
TO THE LAB!
First, we must observe our specimen in its entirety.
Now that I've sufficiently ruined my mascara, let us begin with the analysis!
Aaaaand I'm already crying. Just like baby Harry.
OMG!! WITTLE HARRY! WITH YOUR WITTLE UNIBROW!
I love Hermione's BISH PLZ face right here.
Hey look! It's the Quidditch field! Yay! I love Quidditch!
Correction: That WAS the Quidditch field.
Either Voldy is thinking super hard, or he's about to launch into a Beyonce dance.
Sorry, Dark Lord, but you're no single lady.
WHOAH that montage was WAY TOO FAST. SO MANY THINGS HAPPENED. I CAN'T EVEN... AUUGHHH.
It might just be the angle of the shot, but the dragon reminds me a lot of Falcor. Awesome.
Ronfaces, I will miss you!!!!
Finally, this water shot is explained! Thank you, Dr. Trailer.
Dear Hogwarts, You are FUCT.
HEAVY METAL, DUDE!
I hope Draco spits at least once while talking in this movie. You know, for old time's sake.
You just HAD to go there again, didn't you, trailer? DIDN'T YOU? I THOUGHT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.
Yeah, yeah, I've already seen this shot like a billion times.
OOOH but I haven't seen THAT!
This is what I like to call the 80s hair metal music video shot. Lucius, where's yr cod piece?
That was WAY HARSH, HARRY.
This image made me do this thing where I gasp and put my hand over my heart because I REALLY FEEL IT.
Ever since I read this scene in the book, I've been dying to see it on screen. OMG IT'S HAPPENING YOU GUYS.
Tears... streaming... down my face.
NEVIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLE!!!!! Finally, the dude gets his moment.
Voldy, I'm sorry to tell you this but... fire makes you look fat.
I really can't wait to see how they justify this scene. I also hope Daniel Radcliffe prepped for it by watching a lot of Michael Bay movies.
CONSTIPATED BATTLE FACE!
CONSTIPATED BATTLE FACE!
Look, David Yates, I'm sure the production schedule was tight, but was there NO TIME for a kissing rehearsal? COME ON.
Karma's a biotch, Bellatrix. JUST LIKE YOU!
Seriously you guys WHAT AM I GONNA DO WITHOUT MY RONFACES?
HELL. TO. THE. YES.
I think I just pulled my arm out of its socket due to massive fist pumping.
HOLY HOGWARTS this movie is going to tear my shizz up. I believe it might be the best one ever, y'all. And I should know, I'm a scientist.
What do you think, fellow scholars? Muggle it up in the comments!