Greetings! Dr. FYA here, ready to hand out advice like Carter's little pills! Because even though I'm not technically a doctor, if there was a problem, yo I'll solve it! Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it... Or just read on.
This week we have an FYAer who is trying to help her BFF through tragedy:
Dear Doctor--
I'm a long time reader, first time commenter. And I've a got a major situation on my hand. My best friend's fiance died in a car accident. One day we were planning their wedding and the next he was gone. We live 1200 miles apart and I really want to send her something. Something good. We've always bonded over the weird and wonderful--cheesy scary movies, our eclectic taste in music, 5am swimming and a Parrot-head bond that runs deep. And yet...we've never seen eye-to-eye on books. And now she is going through something horrible and I'd like to find her the perfect book. I know a book will not be the solution to all of her problems, but I just want her to know, "it will be okay. She will be okay." Any suggestions are greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!
--Maggie
Dear Maggie,
First of all, my deepest condolences to your friend. What she's going through is truly, awfully horrible, and she needs friends like you in her life right now. I think it's wonderful that you would like to bridge this heretofore uncharted territory in your friendship -- books -- and also encourage you to continue seeking out your already established means of connection. When miles separate you, might I suggest trying to watch the same thing at the same time while talking on the phone?(If you haven't already done so, that is!) It sounds tricky, but picking out a movie (or in my case, co-watching figure skating) while on the phone with a loved one brings a sense of normalcy and intimacy -- just like you were hanging out. As far as book suggestions? I'll split these up into three categories: Anger, Escape and Therapeutic.
• Anger: Sometimes reading about people who are also dealing with terrible circumstances can help us process our anger about our own situations. Please Ignore Vera Dietz by A.S. King is a great example. Not only is it a good gateway book into the world of YA, but King manages to balance shitty circumstances with the bizarre in her own spectacular way that can bring the reader right out of their own life, while allowing them to feel righteous anger. This might also be a good time to introduce your favorite Dystopia, but I would be careful of the content, as some of them might hit tender spots too close to home.
• Escape: Remember the first time you read the Harry Potter series? If that isn't a bona fide comfort food for the soul, I don't know what is. I suggest The Apothecary by Maile Meloy. A middle grade fantasy with both history and magic that is sure to take a person out of their own head.
• Therapeutic: These books might bring on some tears, but if the reader is ready, they're sure to be curative. How To Say Goodbye In Robot by Natalie Standiford and Everybody Sees The Ants by A.S. King are both balanced with fun and melancholy, and have an emotionally cleansing effect.
Maggie, I certainly hope these suggestions help, or inspire you to find other books in the same vein that your friend might like, and now turn it over to our fellow YA doctors, to suggest their course of treatment in the comments.
Sincerely,
Dr. FYA
