Good afternoon, ladies and Brian!! Or, good morning, because I JUST WOKE UP. Whaaaa? I guess the hour and forty-five minute sheer joy of seeing all those abs on the big screen wore me out!
So if you, too, are planning to see Magic Mike this weekend, there are a few things you need to know! The first is that there is actually a plot to this movie. I know! It's not entirely stripping! I was disappointed, too. The second is that the stripping scenes are really, really fun. Really fun. I don't think I could ever actually go to a strip club, since I'm pretty sure busting out into hopeless laughter is not the right response when a man strips down to a thong. But they were truly the highlight of the film, wth their joyous embrace of sexiness.
In fact, the only thing that makes Magic Mike better is, of course, copious amounts of booze. And that's where we come in!! Make sure to make note of these rules and bring them to the theatre, so that you can get the true Magic Mike experience!
THE MAGIC MIKE DRINKING GAME:
Anytime abs appear on the screen
Anytime you wonder why, as charming as Channing Tatum is, Joe Manganiello wasn't the lead in this film. (Hum.min.a.)
Anytime Olivia Munn appears on the screen. (Though, truth be told, she's not as awful as usual.)
Anytime buttocks appear on the screen.
Take a shot:
Anytime Matthew McConaughey says "all right, all right, all right!"
There is a shot of drugs, or of drug use
When you see the penis pump
Anytime the teacup pig appears
And there you have it! That ought to keep you nice and sauced during the film. One word of, well, warning, I guess: This is actually a movie, with a plot and characterization. I say this because it seems like a lot of people are expecting endless scenes of stripping. There is stripping, and it is hilarious fun, but it's a film by Steven Soderbergh, after all. There's a story here, and it's at times sad and at times light-hearted and often depressing. Don't be like the rude assholes behind me who complained every time there was talking on the screen, or you'll miss what happens to be a pretty good movie.