Cover Story: In which we totally judge a book by its cover. See More...

Cover Story: Pride and Prejudice

Erin kicks off Pride and Prejudice week with a look at several of P&P's covers . . . and a willful forgetfulness which allows her to summise the plot of the book.

Cover Story: Pride and Prejudice

You guys!  Happy Monday!  I know; I never say that.  But it's my daughter's birthday, my feet are up, my dog's asleep and I'm watching Toddlers and Tiaras in an effort to feel like a great mom.  It's sort of like when you watch Prison Wives, you know, and you think, "well, my biggest complaint about my boyfriend is that he sometimes says dumb stuff, not that he murdered twelve people."  It makes you feel better about your own life choices.

Anyway!  I digress!  GUESS WHAT, you guys?  It's Pride and Prejudice week here at FYA!  That's right; an entire week devoted to what is personally my favorite book, Pride and Prejudice.  We have tons of P&P-related posts planned this week, including several very important reviews of some of those weird P&P sequels and also a drinking game or two.  I know; I know.  YOU'RE WELCOME.  Please don't thank us; just send us some champ cans.

This morning we're going to kick things off with a look at a few of the different P&P book covers.  What if I'd never heard of Pride and Prejudice before?  What would I assume this book was about if I judged it from its cover?  (Hint: Darcy's penis.  As always.)

 

Fitzwilliam "Fitz" Darcy has always known he was gay.  Even as a kid he was more interested in playing doctor with his best friend Will than playing football with his overly macho cousin, "the Colonel."  So when Fitz moves to the podunk little town of Netherfield, he figures life is officially over.

But life always offers surprises, and it isn't long until Fitz's quiet little life is turned upside down.  He starts spending time at a local underground hangout called Merryton, which is where he meets the mysterious and sarcastic drag queen and Liza Minelli impersonator, Lizzie.

Lizzie has a storied past, and takes an instant dislike to Fitz.  His floppy hair and stupid facehair is the last thing Lizzie needs in his life. So why can't he stay away?

Fitz always gets what he wants, and he has to find a way to convince Lizzie to be his one and only.  But will his plan to learn and perform the entire score of Cabaret work?  Or will winning Lizzie's heart take even more guts?  Find out in this charming and funny romance from England's award winning spinster author, Jane Austen.

 

Angels Eliza and Jane have received a tricky proposition from St Peter.  Somehow they have to travel to Earth and convince earthling Charlotte Lucas to marry the Lord's finest servant, The Reverend Mister Collins.  The Reverend Mister Collins is divinely happy in his life as the particular friend of the right Honorable Lady Catherine DeBourgh, and he only wants for one thing.  He needs a quiet wife to make his life complete, and he prays to the Lord that He might deliver him a woman.  Any woman will do.

But no, the Lord has particular plans, and demands that Eliza and Jane convince Charlotte Lucas that The Reverend Mister Collins is the man for her.  But how will they convince a twenty-seven year old single woman that getting married is the thing to do?

Romance goes religious in this hilarious new chick lit book from England's award-winning author Jane Austen! 

 

Life was always easy for Lizzie Bennett.  The second eldest of five children, her only real concern was making sure her older sister Jane didn't prostrate herself for strangers and her younger sister Lydia didn't star on Girls Gone Wild.  But Lizzie's carefree life changes in an instant when she meets the dark and disturbing Fitzwilliam Darcy.

Lizzie tells Darcy she isn't interested in him, but he refuses to accept her disinterest.  His clever compliments escalate into unwanted letters and uninvited visits.  How can Lizzie get him to back off?

In this tense pyschological thriller, England's favorite mystery writer, Jane Austen, explores the dark side of romance.  Her clever prose and breathless plotting will have you racing to the last page.

 

Once upon the time there was a book that was revered amongst all the women in the world.  It featured a dark and silent hero, a spunky heroine and a long-suffering father.  But teenagers didn't read it because it was, like, old timey and stuff, so they stuck a cover on it to make it look more like Twilight.

Or maybe it's about, like, getting your period for the first time.  Who the fuck knows?

In this book by Jane Austen, some things happen and probably some of them involve uterus sloughing.  Enjoy becoming a woman, kids.

 

You guys, we hope you have a GREAT Pride and Prejudice week!  Here's to Lizzie and Darcy and balls at Netherfield!

 

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Erin Callahan's photo About the Author: Erin is loud, foul-mouthed, an unrepentant lover of trashy movies and believes that champagne should be an every day drink. When she isn't drowning in a sea of engineers for whom Dilbert is still uproariously funny, she's writing about books, tv, the cult of VC Andrews and more.
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