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The GILMORE GIRLS Rewatch Project: Purple Hair, Deviled Eggs And Jon Hamm

Yes, that's right. Jon Hamm.

The GILMORE GIRLS Rewatch Project: Purple Hair, Deviled Eggs And Jon Hamm

Follow along the whole rewatch here!

Last week, on Gilmore Girls...

We're on Week 16 of our Gilmore Girls Rewatch Project, and I don't know if I'm the only one holding my breath until "They Shoot Gilmores, Don't They?", but we are NEARLY there. This week we have the three episodes preceding that all-time gem of an ep, and I have to say, the Sherman-Palladino posse do a fine job of building up to it. 

So let's get to it, but first! A reminder of our drinking game rules:

The Gilmore Girls Drinking Game Rules

Drink once every time:

Lorelai or Rory drinks coffee.

Emily gets flustered by Lorelai's bizarre sense of humor.

Sookie is controlling about food.

Paris is controlling about anything.

Michel snubs a customer.

Luke is crotchety.

Taylor has an absurd scheme for Stars Hollow.

The girls acquire massive amounts of food and then fail to take even one bite.


Drink twice every time:

Kirk has a new job.

You see a town troubadour.

Emily gets a new maid.

You see a moment from the credits.

On to the episodes!

3.04 "One's Got Class and The Other One Dyes"

It was the best week of Lane Kim's life; it was the worst week of Lane Kim's life. Lane is having a blast, practicing with her new Dave Rygalski-led band (and OH HEY Zack and Brian!) very, very quietly in Carol King's music shop. Why do they have to play so quietly? Because Mama Kim has ears EVERYWHERE. Lane realizes she has to either quit or tell her mom about the band so they can practice like grown-ups. She truly has no idea what to do, especially because Dave is quite charmingly heartsick at the idea of her quitting. Then Mrs. Kim delivers a bunch of Seventh Day Adventist college applications - of course, none of those "party schools" that let boys and girls sit in the cafeteria together, lordy no - and Lane decides it's time to rebel. She has Rory dye her hair purple, until she panics and dyes it right back to black. Still, she has one Polaroid of her fleeting liberation, and her hair is technically still dyed, so baby steps, right Lane?

Also, Lane admits to Rory, in the cutest confession ever, that she's "in love" with Dave (get in line, amiright ladies?) - "just like what you and Dean have." Oh sweet, stupid Lane. To prove my point, Rory is something of an asshole to poor Tree Floozy when she's checking her out at the beauty shop. Rory's so mean, in fact, that I actually feel bad for Tree Floozy. For a moment, I'm tempted to call her by her real name instead, except I just really like the ring of Tree Floozy, and anyway, she won't be around much longer (spoiler!). Tree Floozy reports Rory's bitchery to Jess, who stores it away and probably feels pretty good about it. Luke tries to give Jess advice on how to treat Tree Floozy with respect, and Jess blows him off by admitting something sad and vulnerable, so I start to like him for a second:

but then he instantly ruins it by shouting at Luke that he won't be Rory's puppy dog the way Luke is ostensibly Lorelai's. Ugh, Jess. Every time you're a jerk to Luke I want to push you in the lake. 

Luke and Lorelai have the cutest episode, in that they're both asked (by Susan from Seinfeld!) to give a speech on being successful business folk for Stars Hollow High. Luke is unsurprisingly crotchety about it, but Lorelai is so excited - until the talk quickly devolves into her own teenage pregnancy incident, and she's ostracized by the Stars Hollow High School PTA Pod People.

Luke finds it all rather droll. 

How many times do I have to drink?

4.

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

1.

Flirtation quota:

Lorelai baby-talks (and Louis Armstrong-talks) Luke into agreeing to the PTA speech, and then she dresses him and makes fun of his Jimmy Buffett shirt and his "Butch" Danes baseball trophy, and he smirks his way through it and it's all so flirty, I could die. Rory gets negative flirtation points this week by actively shuddering when Lane brings up Dean. 

Best/most dated pop culture reference:

Luke's Jimmy Buffett shirt! Oh, how I giggle at Lorelai's pure glee upon discovering that Luke is a Parrothead. "But he's so mellow."

Sookie's best dish of the episode:

Nope.

Lorelai's craziest outfit:

She's dressed very professionally this episode on account of trying to impress the pod people.

Kirk insanity:

I present to you, in full, Lane's reasoning for the near-silent band practice: "Once, a guy in our town named Kirk was practicing Bohemian Rhapsody with his band, the Kirk Gleason Five, and my mom shut them down so fast that the band fled without their instruments and never came back for them. To this day, Kirk can’t listen to Queen without tearing up."

Michel madness:

Michel is not impressed that Lorelai's been chosen as a speaker for the PTA: "You must be very fortunate to live in this tiny town where people make very little money. It elevates you by comparison. I wonder who their last speaker was - the fellow in short pants that walks up and down the square with a metal detector? And if they find someone who drives a car that is less than eight years old, what will they do – crown him king of successful people?"

Best Gilmore Gal witticism:

One of my favorite throwaway Lorelai moments ever is when Luke's reminding her of how she bullied him into the PTA talk and she says, in this sing-songy Dennis the Menace voice:

Random observation:

I think one of the greatest things about Lorelai is that she absolutely refuses to let anyone judge her or shame her for her choices. The disapproving PTA Pod People never back her down for one second, and that is one of the reasons I will always love Lorelai Gilmore. 

3.05 "Eight O'Clock at the Oasis"

Well hello, Jon Hamm. Emily invites Lorelai to a charity auction, where she meets Mr. Hamm and is appropriately stymied by his handsomeness. She gets his number from her mom - and you know it kills her to do so, while of course Emily is delighted - and he immediately invites on her two dates: one, to dinner the next night, and then he plans to take her IN HIS PRIVATE JET TO A DAVID BOWIE CONCERT the following week. Unfortunately the first date is a major dud, so Lorelai cancels on Bowie because SHE IS AN INGRATE, and Emily is humiliated because she's friends with Jon Hamm's mother. Lorelai apologizes after Richard so adorably forces her ("If my wife wants the first cup of tea, she’s going to have the first cup of tea, and that’s it!"), and Emily forgives her only after tricking Lorelai into attending the Bowie concert anyway. We hear nothing about this concert later, so I have no idea if it happens, and that makes this episode one hell of a cruel, unresolved cliffhanger.

Meanwhile, Lorelai and Rory have a new neighbor, an incredibly annoying little guy named Dwight who has transformed "Beanie Morrison's old place" into his own tiki-bestrewn oasis. He shanghais Lorelai into watering his yard three times a day while he's out of town, and Lorelai responds the exact way I would: 

While Rory's watering the lawn on Lorelai's behalf, she has a bit of a sprinkler disaster. She runs into Jess while she's looking for help, and they share what I will fully and freely admit is THE HOTTEST SCENE EVER. Too hot for gifs, even. Must be accurately represented:

Finally, Luke and Jess are utterly horrified when they see a woman breastfeeding in the diner. Neanderthals. 

How many times do I have to drink?

8.

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

4.

Flirtation quota:

Lorelai flirts with JON HAMM, people. They split a glass of merlot in the hottest way possible.

Still. This.

Best/most dated pop culture reference:

When Rory asks why she and Lorelai haven't decorated their house like Dwight's plentiful tiki majesty, Lorelai replies: "Well, we are not two wild and crazy guys."

Sookie's best dish of the episode:

Nada.

Lorelai's craziest outfit:

She changed outfits ten times before her big date with Jon Hamm, and this crazy impressionistic chiffon bell-sleeved thing is what she finally settled on. 

Kirk insanity:

Zilch. 

Michel madness:

Michel really, really wants to attend the auction with Lorelai - so much so that he actually begs and agrees to several dehumanizing tasks at the inn so she'll take him. Apparently he loves "the drama, the strategy." Also, he knows that since Emily Gilmore is involved, "it will be impeccable." Is it okay that I'm sort of a Michel and Emily 'shipper?

Best Gilmore Gal witticism:

As Rory reads aloud Dwight's incredibly long note expressing shock at how nice his new neighbors are, Lorelai: "Yeah, apparently Dwight’s last home was Oz, and not as in The Wizard Of."

Random observation:

You guys, Emily's nickname among the society set is COBRA. That is so, so rad.

3.06 "Take the Deviled Eggs"

Rory's been invited to Sherry's baby shower, and Lorelai very generously (and reluctantly) encourages her to go. She even drives her to Boston for the occasion, with the intention of doing some big city shopping until Rory's ready to split. But Sherry springs up out of nowhere and demands that Lorelai also attend the party, and as with EVERYTHING Sherry does, it seems like she's being sweet when she's actually being controlling and inconsiderate. Of course the baby shower is a nightmare, like all baby showers, full of stupid games and nonsensical rules, but it's extra horrifying for poor Lorelai. She has to witness minute details about Christopher's perfect little life with Sherry, and sit and smile as all the women coo about how there aren't many Christophers in the world. Then Sherry makes it worse by taking Lorelai aside and gushing about how attentive and protective and loving Christopher has been, and crediting Lorelai with sending him back from Sookie's wedding "a changed man." I guess I could believe that she's being sincere here, but knowing what we do about Sherry's actions in the future, I wouldn't put it past her to be actively trolling Lorelai, intentionally trying to make her feel bad about herself and sneakily bragging about how she won.

Meanwhile, Jess has bought an ugly, new-to-him car from Gypsy, and Luke is very suspicious about where he got the money to secure it. He snoops around, worried about drugs or human trafficking until Jess finally 'fesses up: he's been working at Walmart. Luke finds this hilariously wholesome. It appears that Rory and Jess' sprinkler-soaked truce of last week is already over, because when Lane flips out on Jess for buying a car while poor Rory still has to walk everywhere (I love you, Lane!), Rory sees Tree Floozy's bra in the backseat and joins in on the haranguing. 

So when Lorelai and Rory are driving past Jess' car after the baby shower, and poor Lorelai is melting down, suffering from the worst combination of feeling furious and heartbroken and entirely incapable of doing anything about it, Rory has an amazing suggestion of what to do with the deviled eggs Sherry forced on them. 

How many times do I have to drink?

5.

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

2.

Flirtation quota:

Not much, honestly, but I'm still so relieved that Luke and Lorelai are back to their cute old bickering routine.

Best/most dated pop culture reference:

When Sherry asks Lorelai where she got her information on parenting when she was pregnant with Rory, Lorelai: "For Keeps. Molly Ringwald, Randall Batinkoff, really underrated little post-John Hughes flick. She went to the prom fat. I found it really inspirational."

Sookie's best dish of the episode:

ARE YOU KIDDING ME. We have now gone THREE EPISODES IN A ROW with no Sookie. This is not okay. She'd better be cooking up a feast next week. 

Lorelai's craziest outfit:

Ski!

Kirk insanity:

So cute - when Kirk orders a patty melt, Luke asks matter-of-factly if he wants it cut in squares or stars. Kirk wants both today. 

Michel madness:

Nada. 

Best Gilmore Gal witticism:

Rory is grossed out at the idea of childbirth. "Kids are cool and all, but getting there seems like a big cosmic joke."

Random observation:

All the town loner stuff in this episode feels a little forced. This ep was written by Amy Sherman-Palladino's husband, Daniel Palladino, and I never find his townie stuff (or his Lorelai rants) as charming and organic as ASP's. 

--

So there you have it! Next week we FINALLY have "They Shoot Gilmores, Don't They?", followed by "Let the Games Begin" and "A Deep-Fried Korean Thanksgiving," so meet us back here next Wednesday morning for all the excitement!

And I leave you with a question, dear FYA readers: is Sherry being deliberately or obliviously cruel to Lorelai here? 

Meredith Borders's photo About the Author: Meredith is the Editorial Director of BIRTH.MOVIES.DEATH. and the Alamo Drafthouse, and the Social Media Director for Fantastic Fest.
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