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Title: Gilmore Girls S6.E19 “I Get A Sidekick Out of You”
Gilmore Girls S6.E20 “Super Cool Party People”
Released: 2006
Series:  Gilmore Girls

Drinks Taken: 27
Cups of Coffee: 6

Last week, on Gilmore Girls

We’re one week away from the Season 6 finale, and I think we can all agree that we’re not looking forward to what’s coming. But while these two episodes have plenty of heartbreak, there’s lots of happiness here, too. So let’s watch our girl get hitched!

But first! A reminder of our drinking game rules: 

Emily, Lorelai, and Rory Gilmore all with drinks in their hands

The Gilmore Girls Drinking Game Rules

Drink once every time:

Lorelai or Rory drinks coffee.
Emily gets flustered by Lorelai’s bizarre sense of humor.
Sookie is controlling about food.
Paris is controlling about anything.
Michel snubs a customer.
Luke is crotchety.
Taylor has an absurd scheme for Stars Hollow.
The girls acquire massive amounts of food and then fail to take even one bite.

Drink twice every time:

Kirk has a new job.
You see a town troubadour.
Emily gets a new maid. 

On to the episodes!

6.19 “I Get A Sidekick Out of You”

Lane and Zack are getting married! Twice! First, they have the most adorable bachelor/bachelorette parties ever, two parties that end up becoming one in Brian’s aunt’s rec room, because these guys are the cutest/lamest/cutest. 

And then they get married twice. See, Mrs. Lane apparently has a terrifying mother, which solidifies Gilmore Girls‘ theme as “every scary mother is some other scary mother’s daughter.” Grandma Kim doesn’t know that Mrs. Kim is a Seventh-day Adventist instead of a Buddhist, so Mrs. Kim is wigging out, hiding all of her rebellious Christian iconography and dragging in a gigantic Buddha statue. It’s fun seeing her rattled – and then when she overhears Lorelai say that Luke won’t be able to attend the wedding because he’s still on the Philly trip, she insists that Lorelai bring a man because “an unmarried woman of a certain age, unescorted, wearing the clothes you tend to wear, people will think things. Bad things.” And, she elaborates, “Kirk does not count!”

Lorelai invites Michel, who is super excited to be asked and has a lot of opinions about what he’s going to wear and how he’s going to dance, but at the last minute he cancels on her because he was gifted with great seats to that night’s Celine Dion concert. If you know Michel, you know what this means to him. Rory happens to be texting with Christopher that very minute (and every other minute of the episode, as he bought them both Sidekicks and can’t stop smothering her with the gift), so she asks Chris to be Lorelai’s last minute date. 

The first wedding, for Grandma Kim’s benefit, is very solemn and Buddhist. 

The second wedding, for Mama Kim’s benefit, is very solemn and Christian. 

Also it’s preceded by the world’s bleakest sex talk from Mrs. Kim: “Marriage is a job, Lane. There are rewards that come with this job, but there are also sacrifices. There are things you’re going to have to do. Terrible things.” Yikes.

But then after the ceremony, Mrs. Kim is excellent for the umpteenth time as she tells Lane, “I’m very tired. I’m going to go home and go straight to bed. I’m going to wear earplugs tonight, the good ones that expand in your ears, so I won’t be able to hear anything that might be going on out in the street at all hours of the night.” Lane and I both grin, and the party gets started in the street as Hep Alien reunites with a rockin’/heartwarmin’ cover of “I’m a Believer,” and the booze starts to flow! 

Espeeecially for some people. Christopher stupidly, offhandedly mentions that Rory might be the next person to get married, and then Lorelai learns that Rory met April last week, and the combination leads to her immediately spiraling into an abyss of certainty that everyone in the world is going to get married before she does. She has EIGHT shots of tequila and then stumbles on stage to give the most mortifying wedding toast in the rich and storied history of mortifying wedding toasts. She repeats several times that she’s no longer getting married on June 3rd, or possibly ever, and it’s a pretty devastating moment. Finally Chris and Rory go onstage to usher her off and eventually take her home – but not until after we see Lane and Zack smile at each other, kiss and say “Totally perfect wedding,” a moment I appreciate because it confirms that Lorelai did not ruin their special night with her drunk antics.

As Rory and Chris are nursing a wasted Lorelai on the couch, Rory gets a call – Logan’s been seriously hurt on his Life and Death Brigade trip to Costa Rica! A frantic Rory takes off and Chris promises to take care of Lorelai. Lorelai wakes in the middle of the night with one hell of a hangover and Chris asleep in the chair by her bed to a phone call from Luke. She mumbles, “Yep, the wedding was great. She looked beautiful,” as we head into the credits. GAH. 

How many times do I have to drink?

14.

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

4.

Flirtation quota

As always, Chris and Lorelai’s mere proximity feels a bit flirty. Zack and Lane are the sweetest and loveliest dudes ever. And in unexpected flirting news, Brian and Mrs. Kim’s foreign exchange student Kyon are making some serious eyes at each other! 

Best/most dated pop culture reference

Paris, debating the relative merits of professorial tenurism: “Where is the incentive to keep the standards high? I mean, remember Professor Leavers? He got tenured and lost all interest. Just sat there, doughy and sleepy. It was like being taught by Jimmy Kimmel.”

Sookie’s best dish of the episode

She makes penis cookies for the bachelorette party, but they expand too much in the oven and we get our other best pop culture reference as Lorelai says, “Helloooo, Tommy Lee.”

Lorelai’s craziest outfit

Her bachelorette ensemb. I know I’ve hated on this fur bomber jacket before, but I really, really hate it. This handy infographic tries to convince me it’s Lauren Graham’s style, when I believe it’s Lorelai, not Lauren, who’s to blame:

Outfit MVP

Look at these beautiful besties. Rory and Lane share a lot of wonderful moments in this episode. 

Kirk insanity

He starts a new business (drink!) called the Yummy Bartenders, hot guys who proceed to allow Lorelai to serve herself eight shots of tequila at Lane’s wedding. His alternate name for the company was “Tasty Morsels of Manhood,” but the entire endeavor comes back to bite him in the ass when he gets jealous of the attention one of the bartenders pays Lulu. 

Michel madness

Best Gilmore Gal witticism

Lorelai, teasing Lane that she didn’t fix Mrs. Kim’s wedding dress of last week: “Now, come on. You’re gonna look beautiful. You have a very pretty face, and you have hands and feet. For some guys, the stuff in between is just annoying.”

Random observation

I’m just so happy for Lane. She really gets the wedding she wants – after sitting through two she doesn’t want. She gets sweet, wonderful, special moments with everyone she cares about, and I love her exchanges with Mrs. Kim and Rory. And Zack just looks so dazzled by her the entire day. It’s really great, and just what this character deserves – regardless of what’s coming.

6.20 “Super Cool Party People”

Why yes, that is a picture of Lorelai and April together as Luke looks on in something other than horror!

But first – Lorelai is dealing with a monster of a hangover as Sookie clues her in on some of her shenanigans of the night before. Girlfriend pulled some really, really dumb stuff at this wedding – starting a limbo match using Zack’s great-uncle’s cane and crowning herself Arm-Wrestling Champion of the World are only part of it. Also, this is apparently how she said goodbye to people all night: 

Luke’s back from Philly, and thank god for Miss Patty, because she’s convinced the entire town to help her cover for Lorelai’s heartbroken toast, lying to Luke that Lorelai’s embarrassing moment was instead a rendition of “Endless Love.” Lorelai thanks Miss Patty, and Miss Patty says “Oh honey, please. I’ve given more drunken toasts than Colin Farrell. You owe me nothing. That Luke… It may take a mule team, but you’re getting him to the altar someday.” Miss Patty is the coolest. Lorelai just sighs, “Yeah, someday.”

But then progress happens! So Luke is hosting April’s birthday party at the diner, and at first he’s a real jerk about it, refusing Lorelai’s help in the rudest way and even refusing her birthday present advice (this dumbass wants to get a teen girl a toiletry kit) because “the minute you get involved in her life, it’ll be all over for me.” What a drama queen you are, Luke. Just as it seems like Lorelai can’t take one more second of this strained dynamic, things improve. Luke is throwing the galaxy’s worst birthday party for teen girls, just expecting them to all stare at each other in the diner and terrifying them with his general crotchetiness. Finally he calls Lorelai in a panic because they’re just sitting in perfect silence, and she arrives to rescue the party! She takes all of the girls to the beauty shop for makeovers, and the party turns into a total blast. She even sneakily exchanges Luke’s toiletry kit for the perfect gift for a science nerd like April – the new edition of The Way Things Work and a gift certificate to The Discovery Store. April’s over the moon, the party’s such a success it turns into a sleepover, she and Lorelai seem to adore each other and Luke is so happy about the whole thing. Everything’s fixed, right? 

AND THEN. Anna is completely insane, you guys. She STORMS into Luke’s diner the next day and screams at him like an unhinged lunatic for letting Lorelai help with the party and stay the night with the girls. I’m not even sure what she’s mad about, but I have a feeling that April came home raving over how cool Lorelai is, and Anna got jealous so she decided to make this about something nebulous, pretending she has a reason to be furious when in truth she just sucks. “If I can’t trust you, Luke, this arrangement is not gonna work. April is not a sweater that you’re borrowing. She’s my kid. I have to know where she is and who she’s with always.” Your rage makes no sense, you crazy jerk! She’s constantly threatening Luke with taking April away, and I begin to see why Luke always seems so stressed lately. 

So Luke goes to Lorelai, who is still joyfully convinced that they’re over their rough patch, to tell her what happened. Lorelai’s crestfallen, and she gives it her last shot: she goes to Anna’s store and introduces herself, hoping that will help. While Anna is perfectly polite and far less crazy-seeming here, she doesn’t budge an inch, telling Lorelai that she doesn’t want April to get attached in case Lorelai disappears because “Engaged isn’t married. People get engaged all the time.” I HATE HER SO MUCH. This is of course the WORST possible thing she could say to Lorelai, who very sweetly and sadly says she understands and then leaves. AUGHHH. 

Okay, also: Rory’s at the hospital where Logan is unconscious, and she’s a wreck. His parents are nowhere to be seen and at first no one will tell her how he’s doing because she isn’t family, so she enlists Paris in the task. Paris is, of course, up to the challenge, and through menacing and manipulation she learns that Logan has a severe concussion, several broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a broken ankle and torn ligaments in both knees. His parachute didn’t open and he had emergency surgery, but now he’s recovering and stable. Rory is so upset, especially when she hears from Honor, who’s trying to make it back from her honeymoon, that Mitchum is refusing to visit the hospital because he’s annoyed with Logan for being irresponsible. So Rory calls Mitchum and gives him the earful of a lifetime: 

Yeah! He does, too. Nobody says no to Rory Gilmore when she’s in the zone. 

Logan wakes and he and Rory have the sweetest reconciliation – Rory apologizes for just letting him take off with barely a goodbye, and Logan maintains that he’s the one who messed up. It’s really nice to see these two so loving and open with each other. I mean, at least one of the main relationships on this show should be in a good place by now, right?

How many times do I have to drink?

13.

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

2.

Flirtation quota

Things are pretty good here and there with Luke and Lorelai, and I like it when she calls him a “hot sherpa” as he lugs her shopping bags around. Even when he tells her about Anna’s freak-out, he’s sweet about it – but you can hear the clock ticking in the background.

Best/most dated pop culture reference

More of Lorelai’s drunken escapades, per Sookie: “When you spotted the videographer, you got suddenly very excited to film your audition tape for America’s Next Top Model.” Lorelai is mortified – she thought it was a dream. “The posing, the strutting, the inappropriate gyrating?” Sookie: “All caught on video and several of Zack’s buddies’ camera phones.” When Lorelai asks why Sookie didn’t stop her, Sookie: “I tried! We all tried, but you were on a mission. You kept saying, ‘I’m not here to make friends. I want to win.'” Hah!

Sookie’s best dish of the episode

She’s mostly just trying to nurse coffee into a groaning Lorelai.

Lorelai’s craziest outfit

I love her crazy post-makeover look. I mean, she looks nuts, but it’s perfect, goofy fun for a teen’s birthday party. 

Outfit MVP

Cool trench, Carmen Sandiego!

Kirk insanity

He wants chicory coffee and a cold banana – two items no longer served at Luke’s that Caesar served in Luke’s absence. Caesar’s having trouble letting go of his time as boss, and it seems Kirk is, too.

Michel madness

He’s made a new website for the Dragonfly, and it’s a big picture of his face. “If you want to hear about the inn, you click on my mouth. And if you want pictures of the inn, you click on my eyes. And if you want to post something about the inn, you click on my ears. Clever, no?”

Best Gilmore Gal witticism

April, about Harold and the Purple Crayon: “I know I’m too old, but it’s still one of my all-time favorite books.” Lorelai: “That’s okay. I’m too old for Us Weekly; it never stopped me.” Amen, sister!

Random observation

This is just such a cruel joke pulled by Amy Sherman-Palladino. We see Lorelai officially meet April at last, and it goes swimmingly, as we knew it would. Lorelai is euphoric, and we see her and Luke really connecting for the first time in ages – and then the rug is pulled out from under her (and us) again just as quickly, all because Anna is a loon. I hate Anna.


That’s it for this week! Meet me back here next Wednesday morning as I team up with Mandy J for the Season 6 finale. We’re covering “Driving Miss Gilmore” and “Partings” so it should be a really easy, fun, laidback time! 

And I leave you with a question, dear FYA readers: I mean, I’m right, right? There’s no legitimate reason for Anna to bellow at Luke and threaten to take away his visits with April, correct? Maybe she could express some concern about Lorelai’s attendance at the slumber party, but her behavior is completely out of hand and she’s just being a melodramatic weirdo, yeah? ESPECIALLY after Lorelai makes the attempt to introduce herself and put Anna’s fears to rest – Anna’s bullheaded refusal to allow Lorelai any latitude means that she sucks, yes? YES? (If you have a differing opinion, I really do want to hear it, despite these leading questions.)

Super cool party people bid you super cool adieu!

Meredith Borders is formerly the Texas-based editor of Fangoria and Birth.Movies.Death., now living and writing (and reading) in Germany. She’s been known to pop by Forever Young Adult since its inception, and she loves YA TV most ardently.