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The GILMORE GIRLS Rewatch Project: Lorelai Will Always Love Luke

Plus Luke's blue hat is back, and Logan has a question for Lorelai. 

The GILMORE GIRLS Rewatch Project: Lorelai Will Always Love Luke

Follow along the whole rewatch here!

Last week, on Gilmore Girls...

Hi, gang! It's me, Mandy J, filling in for Meredith while she's at Comic-Con. It’s been a while, no? What have you been doing? Where have you been hanging out? What new hat styles have you tried? Now that we’ve dispensed with the pleasantries, let’s get down to Gilmore-ing, shall we?

First, let’s “drink in” the drinking game rules (yes, I know. We are ALL better than that pun, but this was my last chance to use it!):

The Gilmore Girls Drinking Game Rules

Drink once every time:

Lorelai or Rory drinks coffee.

Emily gets flustered by Lorelai's bizarre sense of humor.

Sookie is controlling about food.

Paris is controlling about anything.

Michel snubs a customer.

Luke is crotchety.

Taylor has an absurd scheme for Stars Hollow.

The girls acquire massive amounts of food and then fail to take even one bite.


Drink twice every time:

Kirk has a new job.

You see a town troubadour.

Emily gets a new maid.

On to the episodes!

7.19 “It’s Just Like Riding a Bike”

You guys… I hate to start this on a downer, but there’s been a death in the Gilmore family. A dear member of Team Gilmore, who has been with us since the first episode, has left us. Please, remove your hats and bow your heads: Lorelai’s Jeep is dead.

Actually, strike that. TWO members of the Gilmore family are dead. Jackson seems to have bull-in-a-china-shopped his way in, around and through Lorelai’s dollhouse while (for some reason) Lorelai was babysitting him. Sookie claims it’s because of chicken pox, but what adult man needs to be monitored like that? At this point, I’m worried that they’re going to “Little House” Stars Hollow in the finale! Click here if you’re not familiar with that reference, and as an aside, I’m fairly certain blowing up a town to spite a railroad developer is a federal crime.

Despite all of this carnage, things are also looking up. Lor has begun to eat at Luke’s again. It’s proportionately awkward. They are both overly polite to each other. So comfortable that they (awkwardly) agree to go car shopping together when Lor receives that bad news from Dr. Gypsy. Listen, we’re all feminists here, right? However you define that word… Girl power, being heard roaring aside, I hate car shopping, and as a lady in her 30s, bought a car last year. When I went, I took my daddy. Not because I don’t have the mental capacity to understand those automobile machines, but because I just don’t CARE about the details that are probably important. What do I care how many horseypowers are in it? Does it run and is it likely to continue to do so? Great. So, Lorelai, I salute you in bringing Luke along. Luke tries desperately to remain tolerant and polite, despite Lorelai being INSANE about picking a new car. She doesn’t like ANYTHING she sees, not even after Luke has found a nearly identical Jeep. At that point, he loses it in grand Luke style, ranting and raving at her. What does Lorelai do? She smiles, because hooray! Friendship dynamic restored.

Meanwhile, in the land of Yale, Rory is waiting to hear from The New York Times. Before I go any further, I want everyone to keep in mind for the rest of the series that these episodes originally aired in April 2007. Now that we have proper context, let’s pick back up with Rory and Paris and the Case of the Letters. (Million dollar idea: flashback/alternate reality spinoff where teen Rory and Paris solve crimes around Chilton.) Paris, in a grand bit of karma from her Harvard rejection straight out of Chilton, has received all of her medical school and law school letters, hoarded them, and wants Rory there when she opens them. Since it’s Paris, it could be that she wants her best friend there for support just as easily as it could be a Wiccan spell trap to steal Rory’s luck/essence. Either way, they open the letters and Paris gets in EVERYWHERE. As for Rory? Nothing. To top it off, Paris goes temporarily insane (insaner?), and dumps Doyle. She says that she doesn’t want to have him sway her decision as to where to go. In one of the greatest Paris scenes of all time, however, Doyle comes back, tells Paris he “changed [his] mind” about letting her break up with him, and he’s just not going because, get this!, he loves her. Aw, Doyle! Just as we are about to watch them ride off into a very neurotic sunset, Rory gets some mail from the Times, and…it’s the thin envelope.

How many times do I have to drink?

This one is very fuzzy math. Is it PER Paris controlling the opening of her acceptance letters? Is it one general drink for the whole scene? See coffee sitch below, but let’s say eight and move on…

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

It’s unclear. Lorelai has a cup of coffee in a “to stay” cup, but then decides to leave when confronted with the polite awkwardness with Luke, so pours it into a “to go” cup. So, one cup of COFFEE, but two CUPS of coffee. See how my math is confused? Let’s judge it by coffee poured, not cups used, and say three.

Flirtation quota:

Even after they’ve broken up, Luke STILL gives her free coffee! I mean, if that’s not true love… He also goes all over creation looking for a new engine for Lorelai’s old Jeep so she won't have to buy a new car. I mean, LUKE… Also, I do not get to talk about this enough, but Paris and Doyle! He won’t LET her break up with him? On paper, that sounds stalkerish. In practice, however, it came out hella sweet.

Best/most dated pop culture reference:

Sookie to Lorelai about her attempts to regain her friendship with Luke: “Oh, history, schmistory. Couples have been breaking up and becoming friends for years. I mean look at Ryan O'Neal and Farrah Fawcett, huh?”

Sookie’s best dish of the episode:

Not much. She’s cooking, but just goofing around in the kitchen. Nothing Sookie-worthy!

Lorelai’s craziest outfit:

I’m sorry, Lorelai… When you were riding this bike and I saw the sleeves for this top, all I could see was Miss Gulch in Wizard of Oz.

Outfit MVP:

I’ve never given it to him, and he tries so hard! So, for my penultimate outfit MVP, I award it to Michel!

Kirk insanity:

Kirk is outraged at the idea that Lorelai has returned to the diner, as he has now procured “the best” stool. Unbeknownst to her, Lorelai had apparently been hogging it, and now it’s his! Combine that with his log of the times Lor has been in Luke’s, and he’s on his ever-so-Kirky game.

Michel madness:

Michel pulls a Howard Hughes and starts on and on about the germs rampant in used cars. Guh-ROSS, Michel.

Best Gilmore Gal witticism:

“I don’t bike, but I HAVE a bike…” Lorelai and I feel the same way about fitness.

Random observation:

Rory and Olivia make eye contact, and Olivia knows to vacate the table so Rory and Paris can have girl talk about Doyle and life in general. I know that seems like a plot contrivance, but men of the world: that’s a real thing that could legit happen. Girls can telepathically request some alone time. Fact.

7.20 “Lorelai? Lorelai?”

True story, you guys: when I have a stress dream, it is always (almost) the same: I am somewhere familiar, like my parents’ house, or by our cabin, and alligators menace. They don’t attack me or anything, but they lunge and hiss, which my subconscious is pretty sure is the sound alligators make if they try to speak. I say this not to one-up Rory in terms of anxiety, but unless her anxiety is about wearing her hair in a style too young for her face, I don’t want to hear it.

Rory has a stress nightmare about being back at Chilton, now that the New York Times has said “It’s not you, it’s…well, yeah. It’s NOT you.” Basically, everyone has moved on and is living fulfilling lives without her. I mean, check out Dream Paris’ fridge pics:

My refrigerator has doodles from my niece, pictures of me and Meredith drunk on a boat, and pictures of me and Mr. Meredith drunk on land. Because I’m LAYERED. Enough about me. Rory is STRESSED. And not to mention Lorelai… She finds out at dinner with her parents that Rory didn’t get the Reston Fellowship, and she’s sucker-punched. I hate that when Rory ambushes her with news.

In better news, Lorelai goes to Luke’s and sees that he's wearing the blue hat she gave him in Season 1 again! He stopped wearing it after the breakup, and just like that, he's wearing it again. They're back to sharing friendly news with each other, and he tells her that he’s going on a boat trip with April. Great, right? Well, stupid April calls after Luke has put a LOT of thought into traveling with a girl (and as a girl whose dad took her hunting without realizing that girls just can’t pee WHEREVER, I appreciate that) and bails because she got into some fancy-schmancy science camp for nerds. Luke’s proud, but bummed.

Rory sulks after the Chicago Sun Times rejects her request for a job, too. You know what, Rory? After I graduated from film school, I didn’t call Miramax to see if they were hiring. I also didn’t call the soap opera I turned down, asking if I could still have the job a week later, but that’s what Rory does: she calls the Providence Journal Bulletin for the job she turned down last week, begging for another chance. They sensibly tell her it’s been filled. I bet they’re great at running into exes in public. As the Yale-educated woman she is, she can be found hiding in her childhood twin bed, in a panic coil. (That’s what I call a stress-induced fetal curl.) I love Rory, but the girl does NOT take a setback well. Remember the yacht?

Things are better in Laneville, at the corner of Zack and Twinsington. Zack has been offered a chance to go on tour with a great, well-known indie band! Just one problem: having twin babies is effing hard, and Lane quickly realizes that logistically, going on the road with Zack would be impossible. She breaks the news to Zack, who sweetly offers to stay home with her, but she just as sweetly insists that he go. I love them.

Now’s when shizz gets real. It’s time for Babette and Miss Patty’s big performance at the local karaoke night. They’ve been saving their voices for this whole episode. To cheer Rory up, Lorelai sings karaoke, the Dolly Parton/superior version of “I Will Always Love You.” Actually, she doesn’t sing it FOR Rory. She sings it for Luke. TO Luke. To make the rest of us cry. Allow the GIF to explain:

Now watch it again, in video form: 

Truth time: I had to skip this scene. I didn’t have it in me to watch it right now, and to be honest, the GIF even made me mist up! I’ve seen it a hundred times, though, and let me tell you: as someone that has been very “What’s so bad about Christopher?” in the past, this is THE SCENE where you just want her and Luke back together so much. Also, Lauren Graham has quite a serviceable singing voice!

One hangover later, Lorelai convalesces on the couch, only to be interrupted by Logan. He’s come by to make us all uncomfortable. He’s asked for Rory’s hand in marriage! What does Lorelai say? Well, this:

How many times do I have to drink?

6

How many cups of coffee do the Gilmore girls drink?

Four! This is my most caffeinated episode yet!

Flirtation quota:

Well, pretty loaded! Lorelai with the serenade, Zack with the “I won’t go without you and the boys”ness, and then there’s Logan asking for Rory’s hand…

Best/most dated pop culture reference:

"So, Salman wants to come over for dinner this weekend.” “Is he bringing that boring wife of his?” “Padma is fine.” -Dream Doyle and Dream Paris, reminding us that at one point, Padma Lakshmi and Salman Rushdie were married.

Sookie’s best dish of the episode:

I’m honored to say that my last episode has Sookie cooking brunch! I’ll miss you most of all, Sookie St. James…

Lorelai’s craziest outfit:

This dress looks like a bacteria culture. Apropos expression, Gilmore.

Outfit MVP:

It’s my last one, and you know what? I’m giving it to every last gol’ danged Gilmore. What a handsome bunch!

Kirk insanity:

Kirk sings “Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?”, and I can never be whole again.

Michel madness:

No such Michel luck! He’s MIA this episode.

Best Gilmore Gal witticism:

“Haven’t you seen Open Water? Dead Calm? Das Boot?” –Lorelai, sharing her fear of sea travel with Luke.

Random observation:

Ugh, Logan. I mean, I guess kudos for going to Lorelai. Rory would appreciate that move. I have never wanted Rory to say yes AND no to something so much! I’ve seen this more times than I’ve seen some relatives, and I am still fraught over what she should say!

--

That's it for this week! Meet Meredith back here next Wednesday morning for THE LAST GILMORE GIRLS REWATCH PROJECT EVER. Gah! She'll be covering "Unto the Breach" and "Bon Voyage," so get ready to cry. 

And I leave you with a question, dear FYA readers: what do YOU think Rory should say?

Mandy Jeronimus's photo About the Author: Mandy recently repatriated back to Minnesota after a twelve year sojourn in Texas. When not working on her upcoming web series, she enjoys brewing beer, wearing grandfatherly sweaters and plagiarizing Winona Ryder’s haircuts from the '90s.
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