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The Originals 3x02: You Hung the Moon

You really wouldn't like Hayley when she's angry.

The Originals 3x02: You Hung the Moon

Previously on The Originals: Klaus had eyes for Aurora, a very long time ago, and Lucien warned him against that. Present day, dead bodies turning up in the Quarter coincides with Lucien’s arrival. Hayley went missing and found herself in Davina’s lair.

The Original Dysfunctional Family Drama

Jackson finally turns up, having apparently gnawed himself out of a wolf trap. He refuses Elijah’s offer of blood and just wants to find Hayley. Elijah goes to tell Klaus that Hayley is missing, but he’s completely unconcerned. Elijah warns him that if anything should happen to the mother of his child, he won’t have to worry about anyone taking Hope from him, she’ll leave of her own accord when she’s old enough to find out. Davina tells the captured Hayley that she can lift the wolf curse, in exchange for Hayley taking out her coven nemesis. Hayley does it, but is immediately confronted by a group of witches.

Cami researches Criminology so she can actually know what she’s doing to help Hot Detective Kinney find the slasher of the Quarter. She finds out that Lucien is the CEO of a land corporation, complete with inspirational Ted Talks. That's enough right there to check "narcisstic tendencies" on the profile. Cami goes to Klaus and insists that he put a stop to Lucien’s murdering. Kinney has done his homework on Cami’s family, and he’s suspicious of her, but he suspects she’s seen things that will help him on the case.

Holy Fang

HOLY HAYLEY MASSACRE.

Elijah staking Lucien through a boundary spell! We haven’t seen a Mikaelson do that that in ages.

Hope toddling into the middle of Hayley and Klaus’ bloody fight (and somehow not falling off that balcony) was heartbreaking, and a big HOLY CRAP, THESE PEOPLE ARE A MESS, moment.

Winners and Losers

Winner: Hayley. She did what she had to do to be free of the curse and get back to her daughter. And though seeing her slaughter ten witches in the span of two seconds was pretty damned disturbing, it was also badass as hell. Then she took on Klaus, and finally manages to shame him over his parenting mistakes. By the end, she and Jackson are installed in their own apartment (courtesy of Saint Elijah), close enough to appease Klaus’ paranoia, but at least no longer under his damn roof.

Loser: Klaus. What are the odds? He’s still being a giant baby, and was only willing to search for the mother of his child, when he realized he’d have to answer about it to his daughter one day. He’s extra grumpy from constantly being told there’s a darkness coming and despite the lack of white oak stakes, he and his family are vulnerable. Lucien believes their former enemy, Tristan, is out to kill Klaus and take down his entire bloodline. Can you blame him?

Original Snark

“Fine. Just tell me who you want dead.” Hayley may be more Mikaelson than she thinks.

“I came through the front door, you appeared through the window like a creeper.” Thus, the basis of Klaus’ appeal, Cami.

“You’ll find bourbon on just about every available surface.” And that completes Freya’s tour of the Mikaelson Family Compound.

“Brad, Chad, Brody? Let's go with Brody.” Never forget, Freya. Klaus is the worst.

“There’s a wolf chained to my wall that claims he took a chunk out of your arm.” Klaus’ tour of the compound varies slightly.

“Where the hell is that bastard?” That could basically be the Klaus Mikaelson Story, Hayley.

Haunting Questions

- What is up with Aurora and Tristan and the Tibetan monastery?

- Is poor Freya ever going to get lucky?

- Can Davina handle the heap of trouble she's landed in?

- How much therapy do we think Hope is going to need? A lot, or ALL OF IT?

Next week: Marcel is threatened by some ass-kicking new chick. And Elijah will forgive Klaus when hell freeezes over.

Was that fun and messy, or what? The Hayley Marshall Appreciation Society meets in the comments!

Kandis Seaver's photo About the Author: Kandis read adult fiction as a teenager and now makes up for it by reading all the YA she can get her hands on. (The swoonier, the better!) She lives in Austin, where she enjoys Wonder Woman collectibles, livetweeting everything, and cocktails with her FYA book club pals. She has never stopped watching Veronica Mars.