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The Originals 3x13: Heart Shaped Box

If only Hayley could take all of these fools to school.

The Originals 3x13: Heart Shaped Box

Previously on The Originals: Prophecy of Mikaelson DOOOM. Marcel became the leader of the Strix, and Aya promised Davina the spell to revive Kol, in exchange for her help with Strix business. Aurora acquired the means to kill off the original family.

The Original Dysfunctional Family Drama

Klaus has the New Orleans police force looking for Aurora, to no avail. Freya has also been searching for the cloaked Aurora night and day, without much luck. This isn’t good enough for Klaus, of course. Then the incredibly tiresome Aurora further wears out her welcome by kidnapping and then shooting Freya and burying her alive, in an obvious attempt to trap Freya’s brothers.

Klaus talks Hayley into helping keep Aurora away from Cami, since his guardianship is no longer welcome. Hayley takes Cami to Marcel’s gym for some good old-fashioned sparring out her anger issues.

Davina negotiates for Kol’s resurrection, in order to help her with the spell to unlink the sire line. Aya lets Davina use a hand of glory to temporarily bring Kol 1.0 back, for assistance with the spell. Kol tries to talk her out of helping the Strix because she won’t like what’s required. She finally realizes they need more than blood, but also the heart of an unsired vampire. Due to the fact that Hayley was turned by her own child’s blood, not by a bite, means that Hayley’s death is necessary to break the spell. Davina calls to warn her that Aya’s witches are on the way, but it’s too late. Cami has some of her dark objects on hand, but ends up getting knocked out for her trouble. Davina melding with ghostly Kol helps to knock out the witches. In an effort to avoid a Strix/Mikaelson war, Marcel digs up Jackson’s dead heart, since it shares the same unsired properties as Hayley’s, for use in the unlinking spell.

Holy Fang

“It’s easy to speak well of Jackson. He was a good man.” The moment Klaus killed me.

Cami and Hayley bonded! All the heart-eyes for lady friendships.

Aya called Hayley “werewolf trash” and now she has to die a gruesome death.

Aya and Aurora have now teamed up to take down the Mikaelsons! I really hate them both.

Winners and Losers

Winner: Aurora. That heinous she-monster is STILL alive. I can’t even, you guys. Obviously, Klaus is all talk with his numerous threats of murder.

Loser: Hayley. As if she hasn’t been through enough lately. Now the Strix are after her, AND her dead husband’s heart was stolen to use for witchcraft that will endanger her family.

Original Snark

“Niklaus, why don’t we reserve any malevolent intentions for ex-girlfriends.” Nobody has a better way with words than my Elijah.

“I keep forgetting to compel the shady landlord to fix it.” Cami has very nearly mastered the proper usage of compulsion.

“You don’t need a lecture, but I am going to take your ass to school.” QUEEN HAYLEY.

“There’s a fight coming, Cami. That’s what the prophecy says. And you’re not going to be much use to the home team, if you’re just standing around, waving a bunch of antiques.” PRAISE.

“Tend to Freya. I have to murder my ex.” If only, Klaus.

“It seems there’s no shortage of those who would stand against our family. Let’s kill them all.” This is how I plan to end all my toasts from now on. Cheers, y’all!

Haunting Questions

- OMG, when is Cami going to stop complaining about living forever? These are not real problems, girl.

- How much do you love how Klaus and Hayley’s relationship has evolved? It’s one of my favorite things.

- Do we really think the Strix are going to help Davina bring Kol back from the dead? Do we even want them to?

- Can someone PLEASE kill the du Martells already?

Next: “A Streetcar Named Desire

Kandis Seaver's photo About the Author: Kandis read adult fiction as a teenager and now makes up for it by reading all the YA she can get her hands on. (The swoonier, the better!) She lives in Austin, where she enjoys Wonder Woman collectibles, livetweeting everything, and cocktails with her FYA book club pals. She has never stopped watching Veronica Mars.