Welcome back to the rewatch, superfans! This week brings us Sam’s first love and a glimpse of those pre-law skills he picked up at Stanford.
Cheers to tuition well-spent!
THE OFFICIAL FYA SUPERNATURAL DRINKING GAME:
Take a drink every time:
• There’s a corpse
• A demon possesses/de-possesses and/or makes a deal with some hapless schmuck
• Someone on the show takes a drink
• Dean crams his face full of junk food
• Anyone is tied up
• Either brother picks a lock
• Someone employs a Titan of Classic Rock as an alias
• The Glorious and Faithful Impala is damaged in the line of duty
7x3: The Girl Next Door
Monster of the Week: Kitsune
After last week’s Leviathan attack, Dean wakes up with a broken leg in the monster-run hospital. Thanks, Obamacare. Luckily, Bobby (looking dashing in a sharp suit) springs the boys before they become lunch. They hole up in the country while Dean’s leg heals, reading (Sam) and watching telenovelas (Dean).
Sam sees a story of killings (lowlifes murdered by icepick, missing pituitary gland) in the local paper that reminds him of a case he worked as a youngster. Flashback to Lil teenage Sammy! While researching how to kill monsters for his dad in a library, he develops a crush on a cute girl, Amy, who isn’t allowed to talk to boys. After he saves her from the attention of bullies, she disregards the rules and after the two bond over being the children of wayward parents, they become kissing buddies. This is unfortunate, as her mother turns out to be the brain-feasting Kitsune they’re hunting. Amy ends up killing her own mother to protect Sam!
In the present, Big Sam pulls a knife on grown-up Amy, who is behind the new killings. She gets the drop on him and runs, but he tracks her home where she introduces him to her young son. She claims to be a mortician so she can get the brains she needs. The only reason she’s killed was because her son was sick and needed fresh brains. The boy’s s better now, and she promises she’ll never kill again, reminding him he owes her. Sam is willing to let her go and convinces Dean that trusting his decision is the right move. OR DOES HE?
After sending Sam on an errand he doubles back to find Amy and stabs her in front of her little boy. Then, to top it off, he tells the boy should he ever kill, he’ll be back for him. Jesus, Dean. The boy claims the only person he’ll ever kill is Dean, and at this point, I’m almost rooting for him.
The Leviathan of it All: While on a grocery run, a Leviathan working as a credit card clerk recognizes Sam’s rock star alias and gets their location! A Leviathan comes to the grocery and pours boiling nacho cheese on the poor clerk before gulping him down.
Drink Count: 6 for corpses, bondage, and the use of Lemmy Kilmister and Lars Ulrich as aliases.
The Quotable Winchesters: “Where’s the pie?” –Dean, looking crushed when Sam brings back cake instead.
Most GIF-able moment:
Dean’s love affair with pie is basically the most stable relationship he’s ever had, including his partnership with Sam.
Jewel Staite of Firefly plays—I kid you not—Amy Pond. Looks like the boys aren’t the only one who can use cool aliases.
7x4: Defending Your Life
Monster of the Week: Osiris
A ghost car runs a man down inside his apartment. The boys are on the case! They discover that, years ago, the man ran down a little girl while drunk. But while they salt and burn her bones, another man (who once ran a dog fighting ring) is mauled to death by a dog after locking himself in an empty bathroom.
They run into an old man who says he was just “convicted” of a crime he’d already spent 30 years in jail for, by some sort of supernatural judge. Dean thinks this entity maybe got things right…why bother to go bat for murderers and animal abusers? He heads to the bar and, guilty over Amy’s death, downs three double Scotches.
Meanwhile Sam heads to check out the barn where the trial was supposedly held by, according to Bobby, Osiris—an Egyptian god who judges people who feel guilty and sentences them. He tells him to get perpetually-guilty Dean the hell out of town. But it’s too late. Osiris has him. He graciously allows the once pre-Law Sammy to act as his attorney.
Osiris calls the ghost of Jo as a witness! Hiya, Jo. Under Sam’s questioning she refutes Osiris’s claim that Dean turned her into a hunter, thereby causing her death. But Osiris says he’s not actually judging Dean. It’s not whether he’s guilty, it’s whether he feels guilty. Sam puts Dean on the stand and tries to logic him out of his guilt. But with Amy’s death weighing on his conscious it is to no avail. Osiris judges him guilty. Sam searches for a way to kill Osiris while Dean has a sweet conversation with ghost Jo who has been sent, unwilling, to kill him. Fortunately, Sam gets to Osiris before she can carry out her command.
In the wrap up, Dean still keeps Sam in the dark about what he did to Amy, and Sam confesses that he doesn’t feel guilty about his past because of the suffering he did in Hell.
The Leviathan of it All: No new info.
Drink Count: 9 for drinks and corpses.
The Quotable Winchesters: “Stop objecting or I will find you in contempt. By which I mean kill you.” –Osiris.
Most GIF-able moment:
Sam’s legal strategy may seem like a joke, but sub in Law & Order for The Good Wife and this is how I got through law school.
Faran Tahir of American Crime and Warehouse 13 plays Osiris.
Next Week: Charisma Carpenter guest stars!