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PRETTY LITTLE LIARS 7x14: Power Play

Oh, you thought this show was dark before? Hold on to your butts.

PRETTY LITTLE LIARS 7x14: Power Play

Welcome back for this week's edition of 13 Reasons Why Marlene Hates Us. Rosemary and Alexis here, barely alive after surviving the SHOCK of finally learning that it was MARY DRAKE who killed Jessica DiLaurentis. I know, I know, we almost didn't recover after they made good on last week's promise of solving a mystery no one cared about anymore. We're still catching our breath after that absolutely bazonkers twist, but we'll do our best to remind you who the hell that one character was from five seasons ago and if we can't remember, we'll just make up a generic white guy name and you'll never know the difference.

AWARDS

THIS WEEK'S MVP

Spencer, for carpeing that dayum fine detective ass (this episode was horrifying, let us have this one).

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Runner up to Detective Marco Fury for managing to recognize Spencer’s sexiness while still staying somewhat within the boundaries of professionalism (we use “somewhat” loosely here) and managing to do detective work like someone who did not pin a plastic badge to their uniform after spending a Saturday morning in cop school.

THIS WEEK'S LVP

It's a long, far fall from grace for last week's MVP, but Aria, despite starting out the episode on high moral ground, sure did let her Ezra blinders take over this episode. Also, like rule #1 of staying sexy and not getting murdered is to not get into the back of a hooded stranger's torture limo.

BIGGEST SHOCK/BEST SURPRISE

That they actually let Ali consider abortion as a serious option, and that they gave her the dialogue to express exactly why it is so necessary that such an option exists: when a woman has had her agency stripped and her future compromised, realizing that you can take your own power back is not just important, but life-saving.

Runner-up: Ted is back!

BIGGEST NO-DUH

That the abortion discussion was only introduced in order to be weaponized against not just one, but TWO women, by A.D.…and the patriarchy.

Runner-up: Ted is compromised…by the patriarchy.

MOST LIT ALLUSION

The self-indulgent recursive notes Nicole made in “Ezra's” “manuscript,” we guess.

THAT'S SO [YOUR TROPE HERE]

Paige and Emily kissed!

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Time to dust off the Bury Your Gays file…

PREVIOUSLY ON PRETTY LITTLE LIARS

Surprisingly, Mary Drake is Spencer’s birth mother. Unsurprisingly, Peter Hastings is a shit father and did not come home from Out of Town when his daughter got shot in the chest/found out she was adopted because of “passport problems.” Also here is a blast from the past: Pastor Ted proposed to Mama Marin, but she needed to “think about it.” Don’t sleep on Pastor Ted, Ash! He’s literally the only good man in the county! There was no file for Aria in Jessica DiLaurentis’ (?) creeper (??) collection (???), which we guess would be very suspicious if any of us remembered why Jessica DiLaurentis had files on the Liars in the first place. Hanna didn’t go through with her #MurderJumanji challenge because *Caleb almost died* and lost her turn/puzzle piece. Sidney’s back, but the only thing that can make us care is the Emria crime-fighting duo that came from it. A.D. mailed a finger (probably Rollins’) to Detective Marco Fury who spent most of last week making out with Spencer. A.D. also maybe mailed a whole person, as Nicole appeared to Aria like an avenging resurrected fiancée from the pitch black of Ezra’s empty apartment.

THIS WEEK

Apparently allergies to the light are catching, because the episode opens on Aria, like Nicole before her, sitting alone in Ezra’s pitch dark apartment, waiting for him to show up (Nicole is here now, so she can finally be certain he will). When he does eventually walk in, he does so apologizing—like, before he is even through the door—and were it not for the fact that he ends his apology by being kind of a manbaby about the fact that Aria, his fiancée, comforted his PTSD-ridden ex-girlfriend and put her to bed IN THEIR BED after running HIS business while he was off being a terrible human and expressly not informing Nicole about his current Facebook relationship status at all, does not particularly want to crash on the couch, we’d have said this is among the moments we’ve ever almost respected him.

Alas.

Anyway, Ezra promises to take Nicole back to the hospital in the morning, because this show would not be this show if a person’s first instinct when someone they care about is hurting *wasn’t* to institutionalize them, and Aria tells him to maybe consider the fact that all of Aria’s clothes in the closet upstairs are probably gonna be a bit of a giveaway whenever Nicole does wake up, so maybe come up with a story before then? And then she storms out, which turns out to be a recurring theme in this episode.

This Is Not The Summit You Are Looking For

In the biggest twist yet, Aria heads to *Alison’s* to crash (…wasn’t Ali JUST Out Of Town For Paperwork that very day? Do Ella and Byron not live in Rosewood anymore? Does Ashley not keep a suite free for the Liars over at the Radley just as matter of course?), but whatever topic these two Liars who are historically myopic about their own dramas and never spend time alone together could possibly find to talk about becomes moot, as they wander into Ali’s dining room and find—yep!—#MurderJumanji right there on the table, wildin’ out, lighting up and making noises like some sort of demon carnival ride as all the magnetic Liars pieces judder around like they’ve been mainlining Spencer’s morning quintuple espresso.

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Rosemary and Alexis tryna follow these plotlines like...

“Do you think it’s broken?” Aria asks, because now that Ezra is back in town all her l33t hacker skillz/confidence with technology are nothing but a cute memory. “It’s gotta be broken.” Also she clearly forgets what any A ever has been capable of.

“Clearly you forget what any A ever has been capable of!” Ali snips back, exasperated that after all these years, not one Liar can connect the dots in this game she has been grooming them for for a decade. “It’s not broken,” she explains patiently, trying to catch Aria, like Hanna and Emily and Spencer before her, up to the game’s speed. “It’s deciding who’s next.”

Morning Comes Electric

Confounding our fantasy that Ali is the master manipulator we want her to be, Ali rings up Spencer to rain down hellfire over Spencer moving the board to her house (implying she’s NOT the gamemaker?)…the next morning, after a good night’s sleep with the demon game just chilling in her dining room (implying she has nothing to fear and so IS the gamemaker?)(okay okay she said she DID try calling Spencer the night before and Spencer just didn’t pick up, but an Alison DiLaurentis who was legit scared for her life would never have settled for *waiting* right?).

Spencer has a whole lot to say in her defense, but first ::cue porno music:: she has to crawl out of bed so as not to wake up one very naked Detective Marco Fury. She promises Alison she left the game in the loft (whose loft!), swears she doesn’t know how it got to her house, but also thank Vanderjesus it’s out of my barn okay gotta go cop in my bed byeeeeeee. But Spencer only gets like four seconds of making out when Fury gets a phone call of his own and jumps out of bed (omg they’re wearing matching underwear!) to head to work. He’s got fingers and corpses to track down, y’all, and actual police confidentiality to keep in the meantime!

Interrupting Hanna and Em’s sapphic-adjacent morning, meanwhile, is Lucas, who is on the phone with Hanna reassuring her that her missing the investors meeting was not the reason that the investors passed. TBH, her ATTENDING the meeting would have had the same result! So, this one is really on your viability as a designer Han, no worries (that is actually very sad).

While Emily whinges about how spending all night tracking Sidney—who just up and trashed Aria’s inexpertly hidden tracker after like five minutes, turns out—gave her precisely zero time to do laundry, and does Hanna have any clean, shapeless shirts that might be long enough to cover these jeggings that are definitely too pelvically form-fitting for any school’s teachers’ dress code? Hanna worries that her not having finished her turn may yet turn up a worse consequence than Caleb’s near-death experience (he is fine, BTW).

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Smells like coffee, subterfuge, and the pheromones of every lesbian-leaning woman in the tri-county area.

“Just, try not to freak out over something you can’t control,” Em says breezily as she swans out the door, which, sure, is the exact advice that anyone in Rosewood but especially the Liars will definitely benefit from!!

(We have no idea how sarcastic we are being—it maybe actually COULD help, because literally no one there has control over anything? But also A.D. is a true monster and they all SHOULD freak out, at least enough to be prepared for whatever might come next!)

Everything Old is School Again

At this point in the day, everyone Liar and Liar-adjacent revert back to their worst high school selves. It’s an easy adjustment for Emily, Paige, and Ali, as they all, you will recall, now work full-time at the very same institution that scarred them each so pointedly for so many years. Very wisdom! Much smart! (Hey, if they’re reverting to their high school insecurities, we can revert to the memes of those seasons, don’t @ us.)

Anyway, Emily finds Paige in the teachers’ lounge and asks her to lunch, but Paige declines: she has to have lunch with Principal Hackett to discuss the fact that she’s been offered a real coaching job at the University of Iowa, which is many states and even a mountain range away from any iteration of A. Before they can have a proper convo about it, though, Alison walks in, and the moment Emily turns her attention away, Paige, following this week’s theme, storms out.

Getting Emily alone, Alison thanks her for being so supportive, but…she’s decided to terminate the pregnancy. She gently explains medical abortion (it is a normal procedure that many women need and get, and is not barbaric), and that having a baby inside her now makes her feel everyday like the man who tricked and tortured her is still in charge. It’s handled really well and we are pleasantly surprised PLL decided to have this convo on the show, despite the fact that we all know that the writers won’t actually go through with Alison having an abortion, because max dramz, and also that one plotline about Emily’s stolen eggs.

Emily offers to take her to the clinic on whatever day Ali made the appointment for, but before Ali can verbally explore how this kind of support makes her feel, Fury shows up. Fun news! The police know the finger sent to Fury belonged to Rollins, and was removed after he had died, and he had died back around the time he disappeared.

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"Or at least, we will be once I explain to the sentient circus peanuts at the Rosewood PD what the world 'homicide' means."

So, Fury asks, did Rollins’ have any enemies??? Alison, who either doesn't realize she's a suspect or doesn't care, is like, "He treated psychiatric patients for years WITHOUT A MEDICAL DEGREE, uhyeah, he probs has an enemy or two." (::your recappers wave enthusiasticly at the camera::) "Including me. I hate that rat bastard. Good riddance. I hope he suffered."

Back at the Estate of Hastings, Spencer walks into her parents’ (“parents”) house to find her dad’s shit everywhere, including a business card for Maddie Harper, P.I., and Peter’s damn passport, which, of course, has TSA-stamped proof that he has been back in the country for a whole week, contradicting Veronica’s whole story about his “passport troubles” the week before.

She has every right to be upset with him as both a daughter and a human being, but his apology for taking so long to get back from Out of Town when Spencer’s been through so much comes with even more manbaby “YOU’RE the real problem” tone than Ezra’s. “You’re sorry for me getting shot, or for me finding out Veronica’s not my real mom?” She knows his passport is fine and he flew in a week ago, so what’s with the lies, Peter you douche? Turns out, he’s been looking for Mary and refuses to let her screw anything else up in his family’s life. He doesn’t regret what happened because he got Spencer out of the deal, and also doesn’t regret not coming home when Spencer was shot because he was busy Being a Man and Protecting Her, and also (critically!) does not regret not coming clean during the Dollhouse incident, when he KNEW about Charlotte from the get-go. HAS PETER FINALLY BEAT OUT KEN DAD FOR WORST PLL DAD??? MAYBE.

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"By 'you' I mean 'you and every girl in a 3-mile radius' and by 'our' I mean 'me and every woman in a 3-mile radius'."

He didn’t find Mary anyway (whatta shock), but he’s working on it and promises Spencer he’ll find her. “Then you chase her away so I never get to see her again?” she asks before, you guessed it, storming out.

At the Brew, Ezra sits Aria down to explain that it was Nicole’s therapist who told them they shouldn’t tell Nicole about Ezra being engaged to another woman because they need her to adjust to life changes gradually (although, Ezra being a douchenozzle is not what we’d consider a “life change” but okay). He apologizes for being a crappy fiancé and even though he does NOT apologize for being a pedophile, stalker, gaslighter, abuser or generally shitty human, or for forcing her to run and staff his business unasked for as long as he chose to hang out in New York, Aria accepts his apology and they kiss and make up.

ARIA. The time was right. The theme was right there. You could have just stormed out!!

Ugh, what a missed opportunity.

Entracte Summit

The Liars gather at Ali’s to discuss what has become of reality. When Alison tells them about Fury’s Fingermail, Hanna freaks. She refuses to accept that after all of this, A.D. is about to get them thrown in jail for murder even though lol isn’t that the whole point? Emily, meanwhile, thinks it might be punishment for never finding Charlotte’s killer (which is so last season we barely remember it). In any case, whoever A.D. is, they have enough evidence to easily frame the Liars for murder.

Alison’s phone buzzes. “Solve the puzzle, get away with murder. Fail and go to jail.”

Fun!  -___-  MurderJumanji just became a timed game: they have to solve the puzzle before the cops find Elliot’s murderer.

Love Hurts

Upon her return to Ezra’s apartment, Aria finds her crappy fiancé crouched over the scattered pages of “his” “manuscript.” Apparently Nicole has the same feelings about this book as we do, but her broken arm caused her aim to be off, so she threw it at her parents instead of Ezra. Aria picks up a page and finds Nicole’s notes scrawled in the margins, “This memory of us kept me alive. I can’t tell you how many nights I thought of you and our love.” But rather than engaging with the obvious issue at hand, Ezra just takes the page out of Aria’s grasp and awkwardly goes back to trying to put them in order.

Since apparently they are very close and good friends now, Aria gets on FakeTime with Ali, who is still at the high school, to discuss the latest Ezra-Nicole developments, and also, she guesses, Ali’s looming game turn. Their discussion is cut short, however, by a 1-2 punch of Ali’s severe morning sickness and an incoming video chat request from “Unknown” for Aria. Aria clicks over to unknown’s video call to see a hooded figure warning her that Jessica DiLaurentis kept excellent records, and if Ezra knew what was in Aria’s file (um, Ezra has his own set of stalker files, he’s probably aware), he’d fo sho dump her ass for Nicole…but then “Nicole would be visiting HIM in jail” for some reason??

Despite the fact that this warning makes zero rhetorical sense, Aria hangs up and angrily chucks her game piece across the room, shattering a wine glass in the middle of a row of four like so much skeet shooting.

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Somewhere in the distance, we hear the sound of Ashley Marin's screams.

Also still at the high school are Emily and Paige, who convene after swim practice to discuss how Paige has to get an answer to U of I by the next day, which hinders Emily’s plan for them to get “another chance at us,” something that it seems like she hasn’t really cared about until this exact moment, but okay. Paige, however, rightly thinks that coming back to Rosewood was a huge mistake. She thought they could all just be over their high school drama, but Emily and Alison are still whispers sisters, and she’s tired of feeling insecure and paranoid about it.

Speaking of drama, Paige heads back to the RTL (Rosewood Teacher’s Lounge), where she discovers that Alison has left her stuff scattered all over a table (which seems like such an Ali thing to do, btw) while she went off to barf. Naturally, Paige finds the medical abortion pamphlet peeking out of her bag, which she reaches in and pulls out to find the attached appointment slip, because yep! Paige is also stuck in high school! Ali returns from the bathroom to see Paige holding her most serious secret yet in the palm of her hand, and snatches it away before gathering her things and…storming out.

Emily, unaware of this violation, meets up with Paige on the street corner later that evening as Paige continues to wrestle with whether or not to take the Iowa job. She doesn’t give Emily the reason why her decision became less firm, but she does say “it turns out things are black and white like I wanted them to be, after all.” As in, turns out Ali is an actual human being who is suffering very tangible effects of trauma who might need a friend by her side! Weird.

Since we only ever got to enjoy their college romance as a dream or a memory, they give us the gift of reminiscing back to those days during the time jump when they’d race each other to make any and all hard decisions, and while Paige’s future seems a smidge bigger than, like, what to watch on Netflix, they climb on the two conveniently placed bikes nearby and race down Rosewood’s only street. In true-to-form PLL fashion, Rosemary assumes this is where Paige will get hit by a bus, but instead, she gets off her bike, tells Emily she’s staying, and they kiss.

Honestly, it’s not as great as we’d hoped it would be. Emily has spent this entire season mother-henning over Alison and there was little to no build up to a Paige romance. They’ve just fought (rather unsexily) in every episode, and the lack of emotional weight this romance holds makes us thing it doesn’t stand a chance long term – and by long term, we mean until next episode.

Duck Duck A.D. Duck

Since it’s Alison’s turn to play the game, A.D. has sent her coordinates that lead her to a baby store called The Darling Duck, but just ask she’s about to go inside to face what will no doubt be a horrible experience, Aria gets another video chat and a dropped pin from the Hooded Horror and totally bounces, abandoning Ali.

Inside the store, a woman recognizes her by name and hands her “her” registry scanner, while simultaneously A.D. sends a game message instructing her to pick ten things for a baby registry for a pregnancy she has decided to terminate. Which takes this episode from pretty dark to, like, freaking black-as-night-can’t-see-a-gloved-hand-in-front-of-your-face-dark. Damn, A.D., you truly are the Biggest Bad!

Alison finishes the registry (wisely having scanned the same onesie like eight times to get her count started), nearly in tears, when the woman working the counter remembers to give her “the item she asked to put on hold for the egg donor.” Alison pulls a necklace with beads that spell out E-M-I-L-Y because yes, yup, YOU BETCHA, INTERNET. We joked that Alison had been impregnated from Emily’s eggs (the one stolen from her like two seasons ago if you can remember back that far), and we were not let down!

Alison reels at the sight, and starts ranting to the salesclerk about “the puzzle piece! Where is the puzzle piece! They had to have left it for you! I NEED THE PUZZLE PIECE!!!” She stumbles around the store knocking literally everything down, but eventually finds the piece she needs hiding in a mobile.

Having recovered enough from her horrific incident at the baby store to make it back home, Alison wastes no time telling Emily the news: she’s been impregnated with Emily’s stolen eggs. We still don’t know who the father of this baby is—are we supposed to assume it’s Rollins? Because, okay, but, like, statistically, it’s probably Peter Hastings.

Emily tries to reason that maybe A.D. is just waeaving a particularly good story, but that that is all it is, but nope: Alison flashes back to the procedure—she remembers being strapped down, trying to stay awake, but eventually losing consciousness. It’s honestly so terrible.

“What if the baby is born with a tattoo that’s a message from A?” – Rosemary’s husband Aaron

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Happy Mothers Day from your totally screwed up friends at PLL!

Impressed as we were with Freeform’s guts in having Alison confront her unwanted pregnancy head-on, we sort of knew they wouldn’t actually go through with it. Now knowing the baby is Emily’s, Ali calls the Women’s Wellness Center to cancel her appointment. Like, she just calls and actually says, “I need to cancel my appointment,” no giving them her name or anything. All of Rosewood’s medical facilities just know the sound of Alison DiLaurentis’ voice by now, we guess!

Anyway, loath as we are to play into A.D.’s hands, smart move, ladies. You need more time to figure things out. This show’s plotlines are more tangled than a pile of choker necklaces in Hanna’s jewelry box—we ALL need a little more time to figure things out.

Aria’s No Good Very Bad Plan

All the while the Ali’s and Emily’s entire human realities are being turned upside down, Aria has followed A.D.’s dropped pin to an alley where a black limousine awaits. It’s door opens as she approaches, and with way less hesitation than the situation requires, she climbs in. Inside, A.D. takes off their hood and mask. Surprise! It’s Sydney. Sydney, who ranks in the top five characters that we do not care about nor wish to see again. Sydney, who claims that yes, she is A.D., which is even more laughable than an entire plotline of a character being implanted with her sometimes-lover’s stolen eggs. Sydney, whose reasons for making up the game amount to…nothing! And she is just chewing scenery.

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She doesn’t even go here!

Anyway, she knows Aria’s desperate to get out of MurderJumanji before her turn comes, “and I can use desperate,” she purrs. So she invites Aria over to the dark side, and we are supposed to believe that Aria is actually considering it even though seven WHOLE seasons have passed and not once has Aria ever appeared treacherous or been tempted to turn against her friends. Maybe if there had been some build up to this moment, an ounce of suspicion against her (outside of tumblr), we’d buy it. But we’ve never really been on the Aria-is-A train and so this weird side-plot feels eye-rolly. Had it been Spencer that Sydney invited to the A-team, well, duh, that would make a little more sense. But Aria? Bish plz.

As thoroughly dumb as the prospect of Aria going bad is, she at least has the wits to clock the earpiece Syd is wearing, and to declare point-blank that obviously Syd is not A.D. So why is she working for them. “Because it sucks being on the losing side,” Sydney says, and she says it with enough feeling that we almost buy her participation.

PASTOR? I Hardly Know Her!

While Emily and Paige and Ali are all living out their best worst lives, Hanna and Spencer have set off on a ::side quest:: to track down Mary Drake before Peter’s P.I. can beat them to it. Spencer’s goal is to find and finally talk to her birth mom, not accost Mary for dragging them all through Hell, so it seems like Hanna is the absolute worst Liar to take this quest up with, but whatevs!

It turns out being weirdly perfect that Hanna is the one with Spencer, because the very last house on their hunt is a small farm house where none other than PASTOR TED answers the door.

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Is there TV purgatory for Generic White Dudes Who Date Your Mom Y/N

He and Hanna seem surprised but pleased to see each other, and we are reminded anew of how great he was for Ashley and Hanna, and how sad we are to realize the marriage never happened. Anyway, the girls are upfront about the reason they showed up, and hand over the one picture Spencer has of Mary. He swears he hasn’t seen her, but expresses genuine hope that he and Hanna can catch up soon. He’s even up for seeing Ashley again! Which for Hanna is obviously very promising, and for us it a sign that duh, Mary Drake is hiding inside his house.

As the girls walk away, Mary Drake doesn’t have the ounce of patience required to wait until they turn the damn corner and pops her head out like a deranged jack-in-the-box. “I kept your secret, cray cray,” he says, deflated, “but now you’ve gotta tell me why you’re sleeping on my couch.” Surprise! She was hiding inside his house! Surprise, even the best of Rosewood men are compromised.

Later that very night, Pastor Ted shows up at Hanna’s Lucas’s loft to spill the beans: not only has Mary Drake been sleeping on his couch, she also is an old flame of his from college and not surprisingly, because this is Rosewood and the amount of adult actors is on a tight budget at all times, he is the father of her first born: Charlotte. If “people storming out” isn’t this episode’s theme, then “old characters no one cares about suddenly having major relevance” is definitely it. He shows Hanna a photo of him with Charlotte* back in the days before her transition, when Ted ran a camp for troubled boys. The other kid in the photograph? Charlotte’s only friend: a boy named Lucas.

“Lucas GOTTESMAN?” Hanna exclaims. “Why, do you know him?” Rosewood’s only pastor for probably a decade who had to have known every person in town asks. “UH YA,” Hanna says. “This is his apartment.”

DUN DUN DUNNNNNN.

There’s Something About Mary

Spencer gets home and Peter’s sitting in the barn waiting for her. He goes missing for weeks at a time, yet when his adult daughter isn’t home by sundown he gets MAN ANGRY. Sounds right!

He starts yelling at her immediately because he suuuuucks, and warns her that Mary is dangerous and can’t be trusted. “OH AND YOU CAN?” Spencer gamely replies. She’s like “try being honest ONE time.” Peter tells Spencer that the last time he saw Mary Drake was when Spencer came back from rehab. Remember WAY back to like season four or something, when Spencer looked out her window in her darkened bedroom and Jessica DiLaurentis appeared like a damn phantom over her shoulder, then just as quickly disappeared? Well, turns out that was Mary, dressed as Jessica, creeping around someone’s bedroom in the middle of the night. WT actual F that is creepy. As Mary tiptoed downstairs that night, Peter caught her in the act and apparently did not call the police. Mary just wanted a glimpse of her daughter.

Honestly Peter’s talking about his past with Mary and it’s just like the “wah wah” adult noise from Charlie Brown but we’re pretty sure he says Mary killed Jessica and tried to frame Peter for it. So!

Oh, right, and that is the reveal we were promised last week, to find out who actually killed Jessica. And just like we promised: this was not actually a reveal. It was just one (bad) man’s (patriarchal) suspicions. Check!

The Final Summit

And so it is finally time for the Liars to convene around MurderJumanji, waiting for Aria, who bustles in late from her dark side limo ride and promptly lies to them about her whereabouts.

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So it’s time to stop being polite, and start getting real…The Real World.

Emily barks at her for abandoning Ali in her time of need, and they fill Aria in on Emily and Alison’s scrambled eggs (bad joke alert!), then Spencer is like “I know you guys are experiencing what might be the most horrifically disgusting violation of anyone’s lifetime…but it’s Aria’s turn to play! Let’s have some compassion for whatever she will be made to do!” Except when they gather around the game board, MurderJumanji is like “Nuh uh, hunny,” and points to Hanna instead, and Aria has gone dark enough for both the egg reveal and Spencer’s guilt-making pity to flow over her like so many Ali tears off a quacking duck’s back.

Hanna has what can only be described as the world’s biggest temper tantrum, yelling that It’s! Not! Fair! A.D. made her wear a kind of racist dress and ruined her investor meeting for a job she hasn’t really done all that much to earn!!! A.D. IS RUINING HER LIFE. We mean, fair call on a punctured career and a hospitalized boyf, but also, a tantrum is a tantrum. Meanwhile, her friend whose eggs were stolen, and her other friend who was unknowingly impregnated with said eggs, just stare at her.

When the other Liars have left the room, Aria gets a text:

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The way A.D. signs texts, it might be Rosemary's mother-in-law.

NEXT TIME

Praise Vanderwaal, these idiots finally decide to bring Mona into the MurderJumanji loop, and we already love her reaction. Also, it looks like Spencer and Ezra take their turn as whisper sisters, and maybe Aria is gonna betray everyone, and also OMG! Troian directed the episode!

KISSES,

RosemAry and Alexis

*Edited to properly reflect Charlotte's name and pronouns. We are extremely sorry for our error.

<-- Pretty Little Liars 7x13: Hold Your Piece

Pretty Little Liars 7x15: In The Eye Abides The Heart -->

Rosemary Hallmark's photo About the Author: Rosemary lives in Little Rock, AR with her cute husband and even cuter dog. At 16, she plucked a copy of Sloppy Firsts off the "New Releases" shelf and hasn't stopped reading YA since. (She's still got a soft spot for the swoony, contemporary stuff.) A former magazine editor, she is now a freelance writer, graphic designer, art director and photo stylist. The rest of her time is spent drinking cocktails, renovating her house and laughing at her husband's ridiculous Pretty Little Liars theories.
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