Cover Story: I’m Too Sexy For My Shirt
Arty Art: Macho, Macho Men
Colour Me Radd: Is That a Pole in Your Hand, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?; Pour Some Water On Me; Backstreet’s Back, All Right!
Colour Me Badd: Dorky Seaman, Sad Tito
I See Your True Colours: Chippendales-Lite
Cover Story: I’m Too Sexy For My Shirt
Well, this cover’s not exactly subtle. Nor does it need to be, because what you see is definitely what you get.
The Deal:
As Mugatu would say, adult colouring books are so hot right now. And this one is adult — or, at least, a bunch of illustrated, often shirtless grown-ass men. Sure, some may say there are better ways to pay tribute to civil servants and armed forces personnel. But some may also be unable to find the joy in gratuitous beefcake artwork (or the many innuendoes that have been made in this book report).
Arty Art: Macho, Macho Men
Some of the poses are ridic(ulosly amazing), but the style of the artwork is as realistic as it can be, given that the subjects are all perfectly muscular Adonises. While there isn’t a dad bod among them, they do have a bit of variety in hairstyles and facial features — and not just limited to ones typical of white dudes. (Hooray, heartthrobs of colour!)
For some highly scientific analysis: of the 30 total drawings, only 10 didn’t feature at least one of the themes shown below.
Colour Me Radd: Is That a Pole in Your Hand, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?
The only fire this guy cares about is the one that’s IN YOUR PANTS.
(Credit for the more intricately coloured illustrations goes to a friend of mine, as there’s a noticeable drop-off in quality for my own handiwork.)
Colour Me Radd: Pour Some Water On Me
As incredible as this pose is, homeboy’s kind of recklessly terrible at his jorb. See all that smoke in the background? THE FIRE HASN’T EVEN BEEN PUT OUT YET. But sure — your chest is what needs watering. This might be the most incompetent firefighter in existence, but DAYUM, does he make up for it in enthusiasm.
Colour Me Radd: Backstreet’s Back, All Right!
This officer and a gentleman is ostensibly in the navy, but he also totally could have just walked off the airport from “I Want It That Way”.
Colour Me Badd: Dorky Seaman
I’m not saying that this drawing is single-handedly ruining sailors for me by being more “Daddy’s Boy” than On the Town. But I’m not not saying that, either.
Colour Me Badd: Sad Tito
Is there a more cruel twist of fate than being gifted with an Adam Rodriguez lookalike (which is why I coloured him accordingly) that is completely clothed and holding a limp hose?
I See Your True Colours: Chippendales-Lite
This colouring book occupies that same sweet spot of hunky entertainment as FYA’s current* favourite Vegas male revue. It’s not as figuratively or literally cheeky as the Chips, but Men in Uniform shares their cheesy and playful spirit. It just wants to give you your smile back!
*I see you, Magic Mike Live.
FTC Full Disclosure: I received my free review copy from Post Hill Press. I received neither money nor froyo for writing this review (dammit!). Men in Uniform is available now.
