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Title: Class S1.E02 “The Coach With The Dragon Tattoo”
Released: 2017
Series:  Class

Previously, on ClassFive Coal Hill Academy students and one teacher—two of whom happen to be aliens—battle a dangerous alien species called the Shadow Kin. They ultimately prevail, thanks to an assist from the Doctor, but they’re left with the promise of more dangers to come.

Class is in Session

Ram struggles at football practice, and both his coach (Coach Dawson) and his father think it’s due to Rachel’s “disappearance.” After practice, Ram goes to see his coach, and instead finds the bloody body of the assistant coach in the locker room. He panics and hides, and when he comes out, the body’s gone. Dawson finds him, and after Ram leaves, he talks to his tattoo, telling it that he’s in charge, not it.

Tanya, April and Charlie discuss their worries about what happened at prom and how Ram’s been ignoring all of them. Their worry spills over into class when Miss Quill gives Ram a hard time, and he storms out of the room. He makes his way outside for a relaxing smoke, only to watch as the lunch lady is killed by some sort of dragon-like creature.

Miss Quill gets suspicious of the inspector observing her class. She thinks he’s evil, and he’s definitely strange, but his biggest issue is that he wants her.

Ram enlists Tanya’s help to investigate, but they’re caught at the school by Dawson. After he tells the kids to go home, he yells at his tattoo. Tanya tells April and Charlie, even though Ram asked her not to tell them, and they go to Mr. Armitage. As they’re about to spill the beans, the dragon appears and kills Armitage.

Ram finally opens up to Tanya, and they loop in April and Charlie. After looking at Charlie’s drawing of the creature, Ram realizes that Dawson’s involved. Meanwhile, Miss Quill and the inspector are attacked by the dragon, and it turns out that her suspicions that he was unusual were right; he was a robot (?). Ram confronts Dawson, but he explains that the tattoo dragon and the one killing people are a mated pair. Dawson threatens the female (the tattooed one) by threatening himself. Ram talks the male into taking Dawson instead of killing them, and they disappear.

Everyone heads back to their respective homes, the day having been saved yet again. April practices her violin, and ignores a phone call from her father; Ram tells his dad everything; and Miss Quil investigates the remaining parts of the robot, finding a mark that says it’s the property of something—or someone—called The Governors.

Pop Quiz!

  • The lunch lady got eaten by a dragon!

  • And then the dragon got Mr. Armitage!

  • The inspector was a robot!

Open Your Textbooks

I definitely feel for the dragons in this episode—they were only killing to survive. I mean, they likely could have found some much more terrible people to kill—RIP, Mr. Armitage, we barely knew ye—but they were limited in their options. I do hope they figure out a way to get the female off Dawson’s skin.

Most Likely/Least Likely to Succeed

Winner: Ram’s dad. His actions in the pilot episode made me think he was a total hard ass, but he was so wonderful with Ram’s confessions at the end of this episode. I’m glad he’s on his son’s side.

Loser: Ram. There are only eight episodes in this first series. Will he have to wash blood and guts off himself in each one?

Take Notes

Tanya: “Do you honestly think nothing else will happen? That nothing else will get pooped out through the bunghole of time?”


Charlie: “That’s not what we’re calling it, are we?”

Tanya: “Miss Quill’s supposed to help us.”


Ram: “Oh yeah, her and her happy super best sparkle team.”

Charlie: “I haven’t seen every alien. The universe is unimaginably big.”

Miss Quill: “So is no one going to ask about the robot?”

Do Your Homework

  • Do teenagers really video chat this much?

  • Will no one miss the assistant coach, the lunch lady, Mr. Armitage, or Coach Dawson?

  • Why is Tanya trying to hack into U.N.I.T.?

  • Was the robot really attracted to Miss Quill, or did she misunderstand his whole “I want you” thing (i.e., he wanted her for science or something)?

  • Who are The Governors? And why are they interested in Miss Quill?

Let’s take it to the comments.

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Mandy (she/her) is a manager at a tech company who lives in Austin, TX, with her husband, son, and dogs. She loves superheroes and pretty much any show or movie with “Star” in the name.