Kilt Drops: 0
Previously on Outlander: Jamie’s hand was maimed in Wentworth, and Claire tried to set it. A smallpox outbreak in Le Havre caused the Comte St. Germain’s ship to be destroyed, which made Claire a new enemy. Claire talked Jamie into trying to stop the Jacobite Rebellion, by making friends in France, via his cousin Jared’s wine business. Jamie promised to tell Murtagh the reasons behind their political machinations – one day.
I’m super excited to have the Frasers back on our screens! And I hope you’re all properly supplied for the updated Outlander drinking game.
While the Frasers try to settle in Paris, Jamie is still having some pretty hideous nightmares about Black Jack Randall. Claire promises that Randall is dead, and Jamie will get past it someday. Claire plagues Jared’s servants with her odd habits of dressing herself, and making her own bed. She voiceovers that on her last visit to Paris, celebrating the end of World War II, she wasn’t able to climb the Eiffel tower because the Nazis had closed it, and now she’s there 100 years before it was even built. Claire visits Master Raymond’s apothecary to procure a potion to help Jamie sleep. Her reputation proceeds her, as he’s no friend of Comte St. Germain either, and she makes a friend of the other herb nerd.
Jamie and Murtagh attract an audience with their sparring in the park. Dueling is outlawed in Paris, so the nobility are excited at the idea that someone might get gutted in public. Murtagh hates Paris, and misses Lard Bucket and Big Head (Rupert and Angus). He suggests simply murdering Bonnie Prince Charlie in order to put an end to the potential rebellion. I appreciate his straightforward approach.
Jared arranges for Jamie to meet Prince Charles at a fancy brothel. Jamie tries to convince the Prince that while he himself hates the English, the Scottish clans cannot agree on anything, let alone are they prepared to unite in rebellion. However, Charles Stuart thinks it’s God’s will that he unites the clans. And he wants Jamie to be received at court, in his stead, to meet the Minister of Finance and get funding for his rebellion.
Claire’s new friend, Louise de Rohan, keeps a monkey as a pet, and visits with her friends while getting waxed. This friendship produces the invitation to Versailles that Claire and Jamie need. At the palace, Jamie runs into ex-flame Annalise, who gains him entry to the king’s dressing chambers, where it’s apparently a great honor to witness the king’s constipation on his royal throne. Jamie requests an introduction, for the sole purpose of suggesting the king add porridge to his diet.
The Minister of Finance, Duverney is most excited to meet Claire, thanks to her ostentatiously low-cut dress. He’s mistaken about her interest in meeting him, but then I was mistaken about his interest in her cleavage, when he’s far more into her feet. King Louis is not oblivious to Claire’s ludicrous dress, despite the fact that his lady companion appears to be wearing pasties, instead of a bodice.
They run into the Duke of Sandringham at Versailles. No one is happy to see him. And Murtagh is barely talked out of running him through, in the presence of the king, which would be a death sentence.
Kilt Drops: 0
Unless you count Claire’s nearly bare bosom in that red dress?
Wit and Wordplay
Murtagh: “Wine is for drinking, not for selling”I’m with Murtagh.
Murtagh: “We’re a people of the land. A simple people, with no great love for outsiders. We will fight, for each other more than naught. You ask us to shed our blood for what? To put a more sympathetic arse on the English throne?”Somehow, the Bonnie Prince doesn’t appreciate Murtagh’s advice.
Claire: “If a Scottish rebellion can be plotted at a French brothel, then perhaps it can be stopped at the French court.”Claire is super chill about the idea of her husband plotting in brothels.
Duke of Sandringham: “I see time has done nothing to dull the sharpness of your tongue, Madame.”You’re just lucky it’s not a dagger, Duke of Sandringham.
- Brothel owner Madame Elise insists to the nobleman that their wives are lonely and simply need dildos. I’m a bit afraid to google the origins. So, if any of you have academic knowledge of how long they’ve been around, please, share with the group!
- Claire meets young Mary Hawkins at Louise’s house. Mary has been betrothed to a wealthy older gentleman, the Vicomte de Marigny. Claire looks like an absurd giant beside the two ladies, but my favorite thing is how horrified, yet fascinated, Claire and Mary are by the idea of Louise getting her nethers waxed. Has this particular torture has been around that long?
- At Versailles, Claire meets the Duke of Sandringham’s new secretary, Alexander Randall, brother of the very much still alive, Black Jack. YIKES. She cannot decide whether to tell Jamie or not. GIRRRL.
Was that a party or what? Join us in the comments to discuss décolletage and d– other reveals!
Next week: Chess matches and changing the future!