Fix: You’ve Watched The Princess Bride A Million Times And You’re Looking For Its Spiritual Successor
Platform: Max
Max Summary:
In a countryside town bordering on a magical land, a young man makes a promise to his beloved that he’ll retrieve a fallen star by venturing into the magical realm.
FYA Summary:
Y’ALL. Somehow we have never discussed this movie on FYA, and it an EGREGIOUS oversight. *rings the Shame bell* Stardust became an instant classic for me upon first watch. It’s something I’ve watched multiple times over the years and still gives me the same thrills as when we first got together. It’s heart-warming and fantastical, silly sometimes but knows it, and actually quite funny.
So, unbeknownst to our protagonist, Tristan, he is the by-product of the night his dad snuck over the eponymous Wall—bordering their regular English town with the magical realm of Stormhold—and spent the night with a princess enslaved by a witch. In order to win the hand of the most popular mean-girl in town, goofy-and-awkward Tristan promises to sneak over the Wall and get Victoria a piece of a shooting star.
Except that shooting star isn’t a hunk of space-rock: when it fell, it became a woman named Yvaine. She was unceremoniously whacked out of her spot in the sky because the king of Stormhold is dying, and in order to figure out which of his children is the most bloodthirsty—and thereby, worthy of the throne—he tosses his necklace out the window and sends them all on a wild chase around the kingdom looking for its resting spot…which just so happens to be around Yvaine’s neck.
Toss in three decrepit witches who can only obtain their youthful appearances by eating the heart of a star, and you’ve got multiple plots all converging around one annoyed and misplaced star-girl.
Familiar Faces:
Who ISN’T familiar in this movie? Seriously, there are SO many famous or about-to-blow-up-at-the-time faces you will find yourself acting out that Leonardo DiCaprio pointing meme constantly. So many FYA favorites have small cameos, starting with Sir Ian McKellen as the voice of the Narrator, Bin Bons Ben Barnes as young Tristan’s dad, an almost-unrecognizable Henry Cavill as Tristan’s rival for his lady love Victoria, played by Sienna Miller. As for our royals, the king is played by legendary Peter O’Toole, and the princes’ famous faces feature Mark Strong and Rupert Everett. Even Rick Gervais plays a random small bit (and if you don’t like Ricky then you’ll enjoy what happens to his character). I’m sure I’m missing a few, but those were my biggest “oh, look!”s.
Charlie Cox as Tristan
Pre-Daredevil, this was probably most of our first interactions with Charlie Cox. Once he got his movie makeover (sorry, but that pre-DeNiro hair was atrocious), I began to harbor a little crush. Every time I watch this I kind of forget that Tristan is kind of a dick to Yvaine at first, and totally deserves for everything to go wrong until he wises up.
Claire Danes as Yvaine
I spend the majority of the movie wondering WHY OH WHY did someone in the hair/makeup/costuming department feel the need to BLEACH Claire’s eyebrows into oblivion? To make her “otherworldly”? Like, you already made her 98% like a normal human woman; did I really need her eyebrows to disappear to remember she’s “different”? Ahem, anyway, I adore Yvaine, even if she is also kind of prickly to start, but, like, who wouldn’t be if they were knocked down to Earth?
Michelle Pfeiffer as Lamia
I know Michelle was a Big Deal in her hey-day, but I feel like I was too young (at the time) to watch many of her movies, so she’s always been kind of a non-entity to me. So if I say this is my favorite movie of hers, take that as you will. I love that she chews UP that scenery and is perfectly, delightfully evil. (I also kind of want her dress.)
Robert DeNiro as Captain Shakespeare
I won’t say too much about his cameo so as not to spoil anything, but it is funny and his first mate’s facial expressions kill me every time.
Couch-Sharing Capability: High
This is not usually the kind of movie my husband would turn on for himself, but I was watching it when he got home from work, and the humor and action managed to capture his attention until he was perched on the edge of the sofa asking me questions about the plot. Watch it with family of all ages, watch it with your friends, show it to strangers—everyone should have a chance to enjoy Stardust!
Recommended Level of Inebriation: Fizzy
I feel like a fancy cocktail featuring glitter or a dry-ice smoke bomb would be most appropriate. Bonus points if it’s a lurid green like the witches’ magic or a deep blue like Yvaine’s dress.
Use of Your Streaming Subscription: Excellent
If I only had one gripe about this movie, it’s that I want more movie. I could use some extra or deleted scenes of Tristan and Yvaine getting to know each other better, because the world could use more Charlie Cox and Claire Danes mooning over each other. (I know there IS a book, and by Neil Gaiman no less, and I think I read it? But, honestly, I think this is a time when the movie outpaces the source material.) But aside from that, you absolutely can’t go wrong by turning off your phone, signing out of your inbox, and spending some time being swept away into a fantastical and funny adventure.
We published this review during the 2023 WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes. This work would not exist without the labor of writers and actors, and we support their goals.
