Oh my goodness, I have missed V.C. Andrews like a young boy misses the comforting feeling of his Fleshlight after his dad reappropriates it for his own use.
Did the previous sentence make you recoil a bit in grossed-out horror? Good, then you’re ready to get back into the swing of things.
Just as an aside, you guys should check out some of the comments left on the last Flowers in the Attic post. They are AMAZING. It turns out, people LOVE Flowers in the Attic? It, like, touched them deep inside, in the tiniest cell in their heart, and they do NOT like people making fun of their favorite book. Wellll . . . buckle up, cheeseheads, cause Incest is Back!
Right. Let’s get back on the incest horse!! Hopefully it doesn’t buck us off. (That’s my Derby Weekend reference; YOU ARE WELCOME.)
First, some housekeeping notes! The rules of the drinking game have remained much the same; however, we have obviously had to make a few additions now that Cathy, Chris and Carrie are out in the wild. Therefore . . .
The Official FYA Petals On the Wind Drinking Game
Drink once anytime:
- you read the words ‘blonde’, ‘blue-eyed’, ‘attic’ or ‘free’
- anytime there is mention of Cathy’s ambitions to dance or Chris’s ambitions to be a doctor
- anytime the words “black” or “fat” are used to describe Henrietta Beech
Chug:
- anytime Henrietta writes something down to communicate with the kids
- during any incidence of incest, until said incest has stopped
- anytime Carrie cries or pitches a fit
- during any scene in which Julian appears, for the length of that scene
- anytime Cathy has sexual relations with any person
Take a shot every time:
- Paul pervs on Cathy
- Paul mentions his dead wife and son
- Cathy talks, or thinks, about being locked in the attic
Just go ahead and finish the entire bottle:
- when Cathy has the miscarriage during her audition and bleeds all over the wood floor
- when Paul tells Cathy to “come” and she doesn’t know what he’s talking about
- when Julian breaks Cathy’s toes
- during the “whipping and tarring” scene
I’ve also made a few small changes to the format of these reviews. After learning that, apparently, people LEGITIMATELY LOVE V.C. ANDREWS and that I am a drunk hillbilly with no taste (true, true and occasionally true; at least if the contents of my Netflix Streaming list have anything to say about it), I set out to discover what elements of this book would cause people to passionately defend it. So I’ve replaced the Creepiness award (cause let’s be honest; everyone in these books are creepy) with “I Can See Why People Like This Book, Because ______.” Look at me! Positivity!
Okay! Let’s get it!
