Fix: You Enjoy John Cusack Films, Quirky Romances With A Side Bit Of Action, You Love The Sub-Genre Of High-School Reunion Movies
Platform: Hoopla or rent it anywhere
IMDB Summary:
Professional assassin Martin Blank is sent on a mission to a small Detroit suburb, Grosse Pointe–where, by coincidence, his 10-year high-school reunion party is about to take place.
FYA Summary:
I’ve been trying to rewatch some old favorites lately, and I get the urge to revisit Grosse Pointe Blank every few years ever since it first came out. Being a tween in the late ‘90s was a wild time; there were so many good movies that came out between ’95-‘00s, and my parents were lax enough to let me see most of them.
This movie is a darling little weirdo. It will not have mass appeal, but that’s kind of its charm. It’s John Cusack—and his sister, natch—playing not quite to their quirkiest, but certainly their most morally questionable. So Martin Blank disappeared from his high school on the night of senior prom, leaving his girlfriend of the time, Debi Newberry, sitting on her porch, waiting, in a $700 dollar dress (in ‘80s $$, no less!). Ten years later, he’s a somewhat disillusioned contract killer whose office manager and reluctant therapist believe it would be a good idea for him to return home for his ten-year high-school reunion.
In truth, Martin has been dreaming of reuniting with Debi for years, and so when a job takes him super close to his hometown, he agrees to visit. Cue various high school and contract-killer hijinks that will make for an unforgettable weekend.
Familiar Faces:
John Cusack as Martin and Minnie Driver as Debi
Growing up I had SUCH a crush on John Cusack, and movies like this were why. He looked very dashing in that all-black ensemble with his awkward confidence. If you think you are too young to have grown up with Cusack, no you’re not, because one of his most “visible” roles is as the voice of Dimitri in Anastasia! You are already primed to fall in love with him, so go check out his biggest works of the ‘80s and ‘90s and ENJOY. (He is still working, but full disclosure I kind of lost touch with John after 2012 in 2009. His acting choices have definitely leaned away from my interests.)
I have not followed Minnie Driver’s career closely, though I have always had a soft spot for her, having been in some favorites of mine (this, obvs; Return to Me; Beautiful, Phantom, Speechless). But recently I saw Hulu promoting her in some “women of the bible” mini-series and it did make me clutch my very non-religious pearls. I fear if I looked her up IRL I may not like what I see…
Joan Cusack as Marcella
I do think it’s sweet that the Cusack siblings show up in each other’s movies a lot; use that nepotism to its full advantage! Joan plays Martin’s plucky (and slightly scary) assistant.
Dan Ackroyd as Grocer
Dan Ackroyd seems to be having a blast as a fellow assassin trying to unionize all the other contract killers to avoid overlaps (but also, really, to keep his fingers in everyone’s pies), and he is COMPLETELY unhinged and quotable; I kind of love it.
Shout-out to other great character actors who pop up, like Jeremy Piven as Martin’s old BFF, Hank Azaria as a questionable FBI agent, and Alan Arkin as the reluctant therapist (he’s scared of Martin after he told him about his job).
Couch-Sharing Capability: It Depends
As I said, this movie is a quirky and dark comedy about assassins, featuring a full-on, multi-minute shoot-‘em-up as part of the finale. So despite what I said about watching this when I was ten, it’s not really FOR kids, and also not for adults who can’t stand movie violence or rooting for people with loose morals.
Recommended Level of Inebriation: Spiked Punch
We spend part of the movie at the Grosse Pointe High reunion in the gym, so kick it old-school with a fruit punch and cheap liquor combo.
Use of Your Streaming Subscription: Nostalgic
This movie is SO ‘90s in the best way. The soundtrack is TOP NOTCH and was my childhood introduction to “Blister in the Sun”, which I dare you to listen to without singing along. And can you even drop off the face of the earth anymore where NO one in your hometown has any idea where you are and uses that to fuel the gossip mill? Minnie and John have great chemistry as old high-school lovers who can’t seem to stay away from each other. The dialogue is snappy and funny and weird and will keep you engaged from start to finish. I hate to keep saying this, but honestly: they rarely make them like this anymore.
I had that poster on my dorm room wall and never noticed Martin was holding a gun. “I killed the president of Paraguay with a fork!”
To be fair, he IS trying to hide it, haha. So many good lines!