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Hey Salvatore lovers! We’re back with this week’s episode of TVD, and now I have even more to live up to than ever, what with George’s awesome recap last week!
I don’t really know what tonight’s episode has in store for us, but after last week’s killing of YHH and the return of Katherine (Huzzah!) it’s BOUND to be full of that thing we call awesome!
So get your drinks ready, and sidle on up to the Salvatore buffet!
Stefan’s room. Elena is suddenly anxious to get back to school, you know, that thing she hasn’t attended in, like, forever. Stefan wants her to attend his own class, however, in which he instructs in the horizontal tango, and tackles her to the bed. Drink!
Katherine (presumably) comes downstairs all dressed to go, and Damon, thinking she’s up to no good, puts her in a choke hold. But it’s not Katherine! It’s Elena! Drink! OMG! Stefan, just rubbed naughty bits with Katherine! He rushes back upstairs and chokes Katherine, but OMG! It’s Elena! Drink! So the first Katherine was really Katherine! Right? Katherine comes in to gloat a little at her mimicking skills.
George: Really, boys, shouldn’t you be able to like, sniff out the difference?
Katherine tries to convince Elena and the Salvatores that she is a needed member of the Scooby Gang, without actually telling them anything important. Both Damon and Katherine are awesome. Drink! Drink! Whoah! A little dizzy!
At school, Caroline approaches Matt in the hallway. They discuss how Tyler ran away from home, and Matt suggests to Caroline that she piss or get off the pot of their relationship. Oh Matty, if you only knew what she was going through! Elena and Stefan arrive at school, discussing why Katherine’s still around –presumably because she wants Klaus dead. Elena isn’t super-excited about the Three’s Company situation at the Salvatores’ with Katherine as the quirky new roommate, so Stefan suggests a sleepover at Elena’s, but she’s already planned slumber party #2 with Bonnie and Caroline. No one makes them report to the principal’s office to explain their gazillion absences.
Damon is flame-throwing YHH’s body, but he seems impervious to fire, even with the dagger in his heart! Perhaps he’s made of holocaust cloak! Damon and Katherine have a heart to heart.
At school, Stefan is telling everyone that Katherine is back, and asks Bonnie to make nice with Luka and his Dad.
George: Bake them something!
JJ notes that it is more important than ever for Bonnie to get her powers back. He then notes that Elena isn’t around, and convinces Bonnie to give him some sugar. In History class, Alaric and Elena discuss letting Aunt Jenna into the Scooby Gang. Alaric, as President of The Handsome Club, doesn’t feel that lying reflects well on his position, but leaves the ultimate decision in Elena’s hands.
At the Bronze, Luka’s Dad meets reluctantly with Stefan. Stefan tells them about YHH’s timely demise, and that if they help in the killing of Klaus, he will in turn help get Luka’s sister back.
George: And here’s a bundt cake…
Damon is going through the Gilbert journals, and Katherine taunts him. They spar verbally a bit, and physically a bit more. Stefan comes in and tells them that YHH thought that Klaus could be killed if someone could harness the power of a bunch of dead witches, which is why he was looking for the site of the great Mystic Falls witch massacre.
Luka and his dad argue over who to trust, and Luka’s dad lets us know he’s firmly in the YHH camp.
At the slumber party, the girls order some take away on some fancy product placement. Aunt Jenna comes in and she and Caroline joke about the craptastic situation their love lives are in. Jenna makes with the declarations of how relationships work, which would be right, if it weren’t for all the things that put the ‘mystic’ in Mystic Falls. So, they decide to go dancing.
Luka and his dad are making plans.
George: Hey, they borrowed the candle emporium and casa of love from JJ!
They do a witchy arm-wrestling grapple and think of YHH.
George: Over the top! Over the top!
Luka astral projects himself into the Salvatore’s house to find Damon and Katherine reading. Katherine reads over Damon’s shoulder, and we find that Emily (Bonnie’s ancestor, if you remember) was killed in the great witch massacre. She goes to get a blood capri sun from the freezer chest, and senses Luka, who’s trying to pull the dagger out of YHH. Luka’s dad tells his astral self to stake Elena, and he does!!!! What?!!!! Damon rushes in and pulls the stake out, then flame-throws YHH’s body. Luka’s real body bursts into flames! Oh no! He’s NOT made of Holocaust cloak. His dad tries to cast a spell on him, but he’s dead! Oh Luka, we heard something late at night, some kind of struggle, some kind of fight, and didn’t ask you what it was. And now you’re dead. And that’s why we should always speak up when we suspect domestic violence, kids.
At the Bronze, everybody’s dancing! Aunt Jenna sees Alaric, and goes for a drink. Bonnie has a funny. Drink! Jenna first compares Alaric to tequila Drink! then tells him that since she’s practically a parent now, she can handle the truth he’s keeping from her. Oh Jenna, that statement is so wrong on so many levels.
Caroline decides it’s a good time for overtures, and runs up onstage and compels the band into playing ultimate karaoke for her. Then she sings! For Matt! Eternal Flame! And she’s awesome! Drink! Like always! Matt is touched. He jumps up on stage and kisses her! The crowd cheers! Drink! Yay!
In not-so-happy times, dead Luka’s dad is hulking out, gathering things of Elena’s, and doing some vengeance witchcraft. Stefan rushes to his door, and dead Luka’s dad blames him for Luka’s death. Um, dude. You are an ass. Accept responsibility and realize you, sir, are the reason your son is dead. He gives Stefan a migraine, and tells him that soon Stefan will know what it feels like to have lost everyone he loves.
At the Salvatores’, Damon gives Katherine a blood capri sun, then stakes her a little, just for old times’ sake. Katherine decides to share information, and tells him that Isobel and Daddy Sark were planning to END the Salvatores, but made a deal with her to spare ONE of them if she would stick around to help kill Klaus. She chose Stefan.
At the Bronze, Elena walks into the ladies’ to find Caroline and Matt mid-makeout. Then Bonnie asks her if it’s alright if she gets it on with JJ. Elena says some really sweet stuff that means she approves. Drink!
Stefan calls her then and she leaves the room so she can hear him JUST in time, as dead Luka’s dad enters the Bronze. Bonnie approaches him, and he starts breaking all of the light bulbs in the place as a show of his rage. He decides he’s going to hold the occupants of the Bronze hostage until he gets Elena. Then he sets the place on fire! Elena tries to reason with him, but he doesn’t have his listening ears on, so Elena and Stefan make a break for it, just as Caroline tackles him from behind! Then, just as she goes to bite him, he makes a funny hand gesture, which sends Caroline into terrible pain! Then Matt runs and grabs him, trying to tell him to stop hurting Caroline, and dude smashes a bottle open and stabs Matt in the neck!!!!!! What. The. Fuck. That, you leprechaun taint, is TOTALLY unacceptable. You need to die. Sorry, you guys, I just went all mamma-bear over Matt. But it’s Maaatttt!!!!!
Caroline rushes to Matt. Give him your blood, Caroline! Give him your blood! Then she does give him her blood! Okay, dead Luka’s dad, I might not demand your death now.
Back at Elena’s, Bonnie is expressing how frustrating it was to not be able to help in the Bronze situation. Elena and Stefan come home, and Stefan asks if they’ve checked the house, as Elena goes upstairs. She enters the bathroom, and dead Luka’s dad pulls a scene from ‘The Shining’ on her! But it’s not Elena! It’s Katherine! Drink! And she eats him up! Bonnie has a sad that dead Luka’s dad is also dead, but then he jumps up and grabs her head! then Stefan kills him dead! Drink!
Damon tells Elena the whole idea was Katherine’s, but Elena doesn’t feel very grateful. Katherine says they all need to learn how to play nice. Alaric walks Jenna home, and tells her that Isobel is dead, but that there are things about her death he can’t tell her, but that he can tell her he loves her. She tells him goodnight.
George: Looks like Alaric’s president of The Handsome Club of One tonight.
JJ tries to talk to Bonnie about how she’s feeling, but what she’s feeling is some kissy action. Drink! Then she shows him her powers are back! Dead Luka’s dead dad gave them back to her right before he died for real! Aw, dead Luka’s dead dad, I guess I forgive you for the asshole move with Mat at the Bronze. Also, he showed her how to kill Klaus!
At the Salvatores’, Damon and Katherine are hanging out, and Damon ponders how the townsfolk of Ye Old Mystic Falls knew about Emily. Katherine comes on to him, and as much as we want to see some Damon/Katherine action, he SO AWESOMELY Drink! throws her out!
Matt suddenly starts breathing –was he dead? Caroline comes clean and confesses to him that she’s a vampire, but he’s not okay with that at all. He suddenly remembers Vicky, and thinks Caroline did something to her! Noooo!
Aunt Jenna and Elena are eating ice cream when the doorbell rings. Jenna goes to answer the door, and it’s Isobel!!! Oh crap!
Oh man, you guys, the next episode isn’t until April 7!!!! What are we going to do until then?!!!! that sucks. Royally.
But back to this episode. Do you think Katherine REALLY chose Stefan as the one to save, or will it be Damon, or neither, or both? What’s going to happen now that Isobel’s back? Where was Sark? Is Bonnie super-powered now? I feel exhausted.
