Miss the Olympics? Me neither. Let’s dish!
When last we left our fanged friends, Damon and Enzo were escaping the Nefarious Professor SnugJumper (AGAIN – seriously why doesn’t someone put a stake in this guy already? Worst villain ever. Even worse than Nefarious Professor Silas.) only Damon has been injected with a serum that makes him crave vampire blood. So they’re basically finding poor bastards to kill and turn so that Damon will feed on them and not Enzo. Rather resourceful if not a bit of a pain in the ass. Enzo’s a good friend. I think I would have just ditched or killed Damon at this point.
Over at Chez Salvatore Katherine/Elena is having Stefan help her study for a history test. She kind of slips that she knows what actually happened (because she’s a million years old) but manages to cover it up. She manages to hide her frustration when Stefan tells her that he’s asked Caroline to come over and help them think of a way to rescue Damon from his Ripper-escapades. Caroline is waylaid by a phone call from Tyler who hasn’t seen Matt in a few days and so of course she drops everything to help him. She’s still feeling a bit bad about sleeping with the guy who murdered Tyler’s mom. It’s kind of adorable and sad (adora-sad) that she believes that she and Tyler will actually be ANYTHING again to one another other than a source of pain and disappointment.
Turns out that Matty Blue-Eyes (source: Katherine Pierce) has been CANOODLING (not really) with Nadia so that she can compel him after the vervane leaves his system. Canoodling with Matt Donovan. Pardon me while I…form a thought-cloud.
*insert Barry White*
Back to the show!
Enzo and Damon are leaving the house of their latest victim only to find the Evil Professor Wes and his Band of Merry Travelers outside chanting. So the boys are trapped inside. And Damon now only has one food source for the foreseeable future. UH-OH ENZO. Damon won’t let him call for help either; he doesn’t want to risk hurting Stefan or Elena.
Katherine/Elena is still working her plan to Win Stefan’s Heart and so they take to the road to save Damon. Of course Katherine wouldn’t be Katherine without sabotaging Stefan’s car and getting oil on her shirt so that they HAVE to get a hotel room to shower, change and wait for the car to get repaired. She does manage to leave the door open ever so slightly so that Stefan sees her getting dressed. Her persistence is rewarded with a kiss. I can’t even get the tiniest bit excited about this because she’s PRETENDING TO BE SOMEONE ELSE, exploiting Stefan’s feelings for Elena and that is just the tiniest bit gross. Stefan, of course, breaks it off and is all, “You just broke up with Damon, this isn’t right, etc” and Katherine pretends to be all, “Oh God you’re right, this totally isn’t ok BLAH BLAH BLAH.”
Caroline and Tyler are filling in the blanks around their HUGE AWKWARD SILENCES when Matt and Nadia come rolling in the door like they’ve just returned from a dirty weekend. They talk of their time in Vegas together and Caroline totally isn’t buying it.
Enzo has decided to chain Damon to a chair in case he’s feeling peckish, only to turn around and phone Stefan. Too bad he’s in the loo and Katherine answers. You can almost HEAR the wheels turning in her mind as Enzo tells her what’s happened to Damon. She feigns concern and gets him to text the address of their location. Her grand plan? To get Damon to attack her and get Stefan to kill him in her defense. CLASSY.
Ok. I need a minute. I often need minutes when I need to rant about Katherine. How has Nadia not told her how sad and pathetic her “plan” is? Stefan doesn’t love you, Katherine. He loves ELENA. And seducing him AS Elena – somehow that’s winning…? Making him believe he’s kissing and touching someone that is actually someone else? I just can’t.
Rant over.
Damon ends up breaking out of his chains and attacking Enzo. Apparently Professor SnugJumper is a bit of a voyeur because he’s just been hanging out with his chanting travelers, taking mental notes on Damon’s deterioration. Enzo’s blood is acidic to Damon (I think I missed something here, not sure how this happened) and so Damon crumples into a ball of pain and Enzo leaves with the Professor. Hmm.
Matt drops a Donovan-truth bomb on Nadia about how shitty Katherine is to her – and he should know because his mom is that golddigger of a next-door neighbor from The OC.
“You’re never going to be as interesting as the next guy she wants to sleep with.” BOOM.
The vervane is out of his system and Matt gives Nadia a smooch before she compels him to forget, which turns into some hot and heavy CANOODLING. But Matt Donovan is a true blue friend – he was only distracting Nadia to get her phone and send a text to Caroline! Too bad he only managed “Help. K” before Nadia sees him and flips out. Still, she only compels him and doesn’t kill him so that makes her a better person than her horrid mother. Caroline is at the door as Nadia leaves and is all, “Bish I KNOW what you’re up to” and Nadia is all, “Girl you best get OUT MA’ WAY”; kerfuffling ensues ended by Tyler pulling Nadia off of Caroline. “Young hybrid beats old vampire!” INDEED.
Katherine/Elena and Stefan show up to where Damon is being kept and he’s super pissed that they’re there. She cuts herself to “prove” that Damon would never hurt her and of course Damon pounces on her like a damn puma. But Stefan doesn’t kill Damon (with the stake that Katherine casually kicks toward him), he cuts himself to distract Damon away from her. And then breaks his neck. SORRY NOT SORRY KATHERINE.
Caroline wants to thank Tyler and is trying SO hard to be positive but Tyler just had to break it down for her with “You slept with the guy who killed my mother. Things will never be good.” That’s probably about right. I mean, there’s no way around that really even if Tyler was an absentee boyfriend for months, even if he had been AROUND and an actual BOYFRIEND to Caroline, and not putting his need for REVENGE above a girl that LOVES HIM, which would prevent something like having hot, against-a-tree sex with his nemesis from ever HAPPENING…but I digress. I’m just saying that Tyler needs to see the bigger picture and take responsibility for the breakdown of his relationship.
Katherine/Elena and Nadia meet for dinner and you can tell that Matt’s words have really sunk in for Nadia. She looks hurt and angry. Katherine really does not give a shit.
“I’m in a really good mood right now which means I don’t really feel like worrying about whatever is making you mopey.”
NICE. Well it turns out that Nadia is mopey because Tyler bit her. OH SHIT.
Later on back at Chez Salvatore, Everyone’s Favorite Besties, Caroline and Stefan, are chatting about what happened with Damon, who is now chained up in the basement. Caroline shows him the weird text from Matt. Stefan tells her how Damon is convinced that Elena has given up on him because she knew he couldn’t resist feeding on her, and so she WANTED Stefan to kill him. Caroline is AGHAST (that’s so NOT Elena! But you know who it DOES sound like…) and the two of them finally start to follow the trail of breadcrumbs all the way to crazy, selfish Katherine.
Moments of Hilarity:
“We all love Matt Donovan. Otherwise he would have been dead a long time ago.” – Katherine to Nadia
“What’s ‘canoodling’?” – Nadia to Matt
“I’m going to get you a little bit more vervane, I’m going to have a drink and I’m going to let you think about what a royal pain in the ass you’ve been lately.” – Stefan to Damon
Moments of Heart-Swelling:
“You don’t know what it’s like being in love with you.” – Stefan to Elena
You guysssss – what is going to happen now? Will Enzo finally get rid of Wes for us? Will he find a cure for his Best Bud/Dream Lover Damon? Will Nadia help The Gang get Katherine out of Elena’s body in exchange for saving her from a werewolf bite? Can I sign up for a canoodling Vegas weekend with Matty Blue-Eyes? INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW.
About the Contributor:
Amanda Reid is an East Coast girl living in California who will never stop missing a true autumn. She’s a bookseller who specializes in kid and teen lit, and she bakes a damn fine pie.
