About:
Previously: Caroline gave birth to Alaric and Jo’s twin girls and we all sobbed when he named one of them for her mother, Stefan fell on a sword (literally) for Damon and is now marked by the Huntress, Beau was murdered by said Huntress, Mary Louise and Nora are now on the run, and Enzo informs Damon that he didn’t actually kill Elena.
What Went Down
Stefan is on the run from Rayna and she is HOT on his trail. A brother can’t even take a pit stop to get a new phone charger without a vengeful supernatural hunter throwing her sword at him. (You would think that Rayna and Stefan could find mutual ground in their shared loathing of Julian, especially since Stefan managed to murder this man who made Rayna kill her own father, but perhaps the writers are saving that tidbit for another episode.) Stefan hightails it to New Orleans, home of The Mikaelson Clan and a cloaked bar that will render him invisible to Rayna.
Who doesn’t love a scene that includes Klaus drinking bourbon? I’m not sure I want to know anyone that doesn’t. Klaus is instantly suspicous of Stefan’s arrival, but hides it with good manners and a generous open bar. Stefan is selective on how much catching up he does, but he should know that you can’t fool Klaus Mikaelson. He’s furious when he realizes that Stefan has led Rayna Cruz back to New Orleans (her original stomping ground) and kicks Stefan out of his bar. Stefan knows he’s doomed, and is so distraught that he leaves his phone behind. Klaus answers a call from Caroline and if you listened closely you could hear a collective SQUEE from all four corners of the globe. COMPLEX FEELINGS, Y’ALL.
Caroline has agreed to go with Alaric to Dallas and help him get set up with his two little ones; she needs a distraction from worrying about Stefan, and I think we all know that she’s not going to be able to say goodbye to those two little muffins. Her surprise conversation with Klaus results in shared parenting experiences, ultimately leading her to feel normal for the attachment she feels towards little Josie and little Elizabeth. Klaus promises Caroline that he will keep Stefan safe and my love for him KNOWS NO BOUNDS.
Meanwhile Damon and Bonnie go to an estate known as The Armory, a house full of supernatural objects collected over the centuries.Turns out that they’re the organization that helped Matt tumble Enzo into his Murder Van all those episodes ago, and since then Enzo has been working for them in exchange for (eventual) info about his family that abandoned him. To a workhouse. Oh Enzo. You sweet, sad man. Tyler has been at The Armory, recuperating from Damon beating his head against the pavement. It says a lot about my indifference toward Tyler Lockwood that I barely remember this happening. Damon and Bonnie backtrack from agreeing to help Enzo/The Armory use Stefan as bait to track Rayna (they REALLY want The Phoenix Sword), so Enzo tosses Damon into Tyler’s recovery room and knocks out Bonnie. This doesn’t bode well for my Benzo ‘ship, guys. Enzo is more than happy to leave Damon with Tyler since it’s a full moon that evening but that’s not going to stop Bonnie from CUTTING OFF ENZO’S HAND in order to get Damon out – except Tyler also gets out and he almost kills Bonnie. (I’m confused. I thought Tyler had control over his transitions since he’s a hybrid?) Since her magic is rendered useless at The Armory Damon isn’t able to heal her with his blood and he has to take her to a hospital. He decides that all he does is put the people he loves at risk and tells a comatose Bonnie that he’s going to leave.
Mary Louise and Nora are on the run but are captured by The Armory when they make a pit-stop for Fritos and Vitamin Water. Oops.
Rayna somehow manages to lure Stefan off the road and into a trap that she’s laid that causes him to crash. She’s waiting for him, crossbow in hand, but this is Klaus-Country, and he whisks in, killing Rayna (for now) and saving Stefan. They leave the werewolf-infested bayou and head back to New Orleans; Klaus thinks he knows a witch that can stop Rayna. Yay for crossover episodes!
Holy CRAP
- Bonnie cut off Enzo’s HAND. And he managed to re-attach it to his arm? Is that how vampire healing works, because DAMN.
- That phone convo between Klaus and Caroline…!
- Klaus telling Stefan that he needs to let Caroline go..! (I mean, he’s speaking from experience here.)
- Enzo is an ancestor of the St. John family – the same family who own The Armory!
Vamp of the Week: Klaus Mikaelson
Sure, Klaus was going to let Stefan be murdered by Rayna but it only took one phonecall from Caroline to turn this 4,000 yr-old monster into TOTAL PUTTY. He dishes out some solid advice to Stefan, and it’s not even self-serving (for once). Klaus knows what it’s like to be the brother that’s in constant need of bailing out, and he’s seen what this has cost Elijah over the millennia so if Stefan wants “normal” he will have to choose between Damon and everyone else. (I mean, he’s not entirely wrong, is he?)
Hero Hair/Nefarious Grin
Hero Hair: GIRRRRRL you better flip-toss that hair of yours because who else would cut off the hand off a man she definitely has (unconscious) hot pants for in order to save her bestie than BONNIE EFFING BENNETT.
Nefarious Grin: Is Tyler a villain? This week, not really. But he is damn smug and annoying, and he almost killed Bonnie. I need all of the head-shaking gifs to properly express my disdain for this man.
Sound Bites
Stefan: “So, how are Elijah and, uh, whoever else you brought back from the dead?” Klaus: “Oh, you know the Mikaelsons. Never a dull moment.” Wait until Stefan meets Freya.
Klaus: “So she carried two lives in her womb. She gave birth to them. And now she plans to turn those cooing little faces over to Alaric without so much as a hiccup of hesitation. You’re right. That sounds like the Caroline I remember.” Klaus Mikaelson: Forever Keepin’ it 100.
Damon: “Once whatever crap Enzo gave you is out of your system and magic works on you again I’m going to give you my blood and heal you. Okay? But in the meantime, there’s something Iw ant you to know. You are a terrible friend, you know that? Do you have any idea what I’d have to go through if you’d died today? Years of guilt. Crippling, self-loathing guilt. Not to mention the resentment I’d feel if I was forced to break in a new drinking buddy. You’re not supposed to die for me, Bon. Neither is my brother. But no matter what I say or how hard I drill it into your skulls, you’re not gonna stop trying, which is why I have to take myself out of the equation. It all ends tomorrow. You’ll never have to worry about me again.” I thought Stefan was the Salvatore Brother who relished in being a martyr.
Burning Questions
- What are The Armory going to do with Mary Louise and Nora?
- How is Benzo EVER going to happen now?
- How epically is Enzo’s newly found family going to let him down?
- How much longer do we give Caroline and Stefan? (Sigh.)
- Does ANYone care about Tyler Lockwood?
- The flash forward: why have the Mikaelson’s left New Orleans??
What did y’all think of this week’s episode? I’m digging this new mythology with The Armory, and it gives Enzo some heft to his backstory which is long overdue. Let’s convo in the comments about how much Tyler Lockwood is The Worst! And how much Klaus is The Best!
About the Contributor:
Amanda Reid is an East Coast girl living in California who will never stop missing a true autumn. She’s a bookseller who specializes in kid and teen lit, and she bakes a damn fine pie.
