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Previously: Alaric compelled away Elena’s memories of Damon, Tripp Fells is murdering vampires, there’s someone sharing the AfterLife house with Damon and Bonnie and Enzo is sick of Fresh Start Stefan’s bullshit.
Stefan is full of Vengeful Wrath for Enzo since he killed Ivy. Come on, Stefan. Y’all were dating for what, a couple of months? She was clearly just a distraction from your grief. Enzo being delightfully unstable is all part of his charm! He compels his “dick boss” to bury Ivy in the woods AND give him a raise (THAT is proper vampire-ing right there), then he takes off for Mystic Falls-Adjacent.
Elena is back to being super perky (ugh) since she doesn’t remember her feelings for Damon, and even Caroline can barely stand it. Elena wants The Gang to get back together for a party at the swimming hole which is sure to be a total disaster. Stefan shows up and the two of them hug it out.( I can’t remember if Stefan knows about Elena losing her memories..?) Elena wants to set up fellow hospital volunteer Liam with Caroline (WHAT? No.) even though he looks like a new inductee into the Young Republicans. Of course Liam actually fancies Elena and do any of us even really care? No? Great! MOVING ON.
Also filed under Potential Relationships No One Cares About: Tyler and Liv.
Matt Donovan wears the gayest tank top to ever NOT be worn in The Castro. He begins to suspect that Squad Leader Tripp Fells might be a bit shady after he finds him and Squad Member Jay washing red liquid out of the back of the van. Uh, ya think?
Stefan agrees to go to the swimming hole jamboree when he finds out that Enzo has been invited. Stefan, I can’t get behind all of your terrible life choices lately, brother. Why do you always have to get in your own way and make hard times EVEN WORSE by slinking off to suffer in silence? Caroline ends up between Enzo and Stefan’s standoff in the woods and finally learns about Enzo killing Ivy. This, just after learning earlier that he killed a diner waitress after snacking on her. (You’re really not endearing yourself to Caroline, Enzo. This is V.V. IMPORTANT.) Stefan proceeds to break Caroline’s heart by not responding to her when she asks him if his return had just the smallest bit to do with wanting to check up on her. He walks away from her. LIKE A COMPLETE MONSTER.
Oh, and Enzo saved Stefan from being killed by Vampire Hunter Jay and heaps his dead body onto the back of Matt’s truck for him and Tyler to deal with. DELEGATION. That doesn’t stop Stefan from staking Enzo in front of Vampire Hunter Tripp and leaving him to be dealt with. Seriously, how did Stefan get to be this terrible?
Meanwhile, Damon and Bonnie grocery shop in the AfterLife and Bonnie is still convinced that they’re not alone. This is further evidenced by the moving circus carousel out front, the missing pork rinds from the store AND Damon’s car suddenly appearing in the parking lot. Never have I seen a man so happy to see his car. I wonder if Damon Salvatore and Dean Winchester: Two Men and Their Muscle Cars fanfic is a thing. Damon refuses to have hope, Bonnie calls out his bullshit and finally the Pork Rind Eater is revealed to be a guy called Kai.
He poisons Damon, mocks Bonnie and pays the price for both because Bonnie gets her mojo back and generally wins this entire episode.
I never thought I would type that sentence.
Thoughts:
- Do we think that Bonnie and Sarah could somehow be related? I don’t think you’re allowed to be a black woman on this show and NOT be a Bennett or a witch.
- Ace of Base playing in the grocery store – are we sure this isn’t one of the Circles of Hell?
- Jeremy’s hair: still unbelievably terrible.
- Caroline finally confessing that she has feelings for Stefan..! He’s kind of killing any potential there with his continued asshattery tho.
- ”You sound oddly supportive AND judgmental.” Because that’s what Caroline Forbes is ABOUT, Enzo.
- ”How embarrassing for you.” BONNIE IS KILLING IT.
- Caroline being annoyed at Enzo for not showing up because he was supposed to bring ice AND Enzo being annoyed at losing her ice. Perfection.
- Vampire Hunter Tripp being like, “I have my own way I like them to die.” Super creepy and kind of fetish-y. Stefan agreeing to it is just MILES WORSE.
So what did you guys think? Is Damon the only person capable of bringing Stefan back his humanity? Do we think that Elena will get too close to Mystic Falls and remember her love for Damon? How happy are y’all that we don’t have to suffer Vampire Hunter Jay for anymore episodes? ONE WAS ENOUGH.
About the Contributor:
Amanda Reid is an East Coast girl living in California who will never stop missing a true autumn. She’s a bookseller who specializes in kid and teen lit, and she bakes a damn fine pie.
